Rainy

It's time to lock the fuck in chat

It's about 4am as I'm writing this and the reason I'm doing so now in the first place was because I just got a random spike of motivation for no reason. Should've done yesterday or the day before, I know, but here I am to announce that Macabre Requiem Chapter 6 is... still not fucking done lmao.
          
          If I'm being totally honest, I sort of just gave up on the book once I got a quarter way through editing. 26000 was the word count the first time around, then it was 32000 after the second revamp, and once I got to revamping it for a third fucking time, that was when I realized it was all getting redundant.
          
          What was holding me back the most from progress was just my own doubt. I kept looking back at the older chapters and realizing how much I could actually do better with the knowledge I know now. And it wasn't just a situation of me wanting to improve my old works. That's a completely normal feeling and it's totally fine if you feel that too. The problem was that the older works were actively affecting how the Chapter would turn out.
          
          Since this Chapter has been worked on for over half a year, I grew a lot as a person and even more so as I writer. I figured out more of my story as I went on and I'm far more educated on topics that I might've dropped the ball on in my earlier works. Basically, I realized how inconvenient it would be to write Chapter 6 with the mindset of it being with the revamps I had planned DESPITE it being the one I work on first. All it did was make the writing process more complicated and as I was slowly deciding on whether I should just abandon the thing or not, I came to the conclusion that the best course of action would probably just to be to restart the whole thing.
          
          Sorry if that was sudden, I'm still complete ass at writing these announcements, but overall, after months of contemplationg, I had realized that I was taking the story in a different direction, one that didn't flow as well with what I already had down.

It's midnight where I am as I'm typing this, so apologies for that, but I am here to tell you that Macabre Requiem Chapter 6 is finally don- Nah I'm fucking kidding I still have a shitload to do lol.
          
          Throughout the half of this month so far, I've barely gotten anything on the page. It's either I write a bunch, end up disliking it afterwards, deleting it, and then rewriting it all, or I just can't even bring myself to type so I fuck off and do whatever (pretty much just play Bloodborne lol).
          
          My motivation has been the lowest it has ever been and combine that with pretty major depressive issues, a relapsing addiction (iykyk), and my own swallowing insecurities and you got one witches pot of misery and poindexterism.
          
          I am really bad at writing these announcements. I look back on the other times and all my words just sound like some robotic saccharine from someone who's trying to hard to make himself sound positive and hopeful. I think now on I should have a thicker layer of honesty so if you want the truth, I feel like shit all the time, lmao.
          
          I don't know when everything will come out. I assume the summertime will help cure of my eternal unmotivation like it did when I first began this story, but who knows.
          
          I'm fairly certain I'll be medicated soon for my (very likely but undiagnosed) ADHD, so if you see a random spike in consistenty and content, that'll probably be why. I do not promote the use of medication abuse at all, but if you do share similar issues to me than I recommend you find your nearest psychiatrist and see if meds will help. It's different for everyone and you are not less for relying on medication or any kind of substance (unless it's affecting your health of course).
          
          Just to wrap this up. I'm probably fine, I just fuck off a little too much and my brain needs to lock in if I ever hope to be a semi-decent writer.
          
          Cya gang. I'll try my best to not take too long.

I FORGOT TO DO MY FUCKING ANNOUNCEMENT AGAIN GODDAMMIT.
          
          Anyways though. We are back as always, and I'm here to say that the writing stage of Chapter 6 is officially done and editing has begun. There are a few scenes that I need to touch up on but overall editing shouldn't take too long. My current estimation for the final product will be around 30k words which while that number is absolutely insane, I think you guys deserve an amount like that after dealing with my lazy bullshit for nearly 5 months lol.
          
          This chapter is packed with character explorations, new ideas, new styles, and action that I hope will satisfy you guys after all that projectile-dodging stuff that I wrote previously (which I will attempt to fix once I get to editing those chapters respectively).
          
          I don't want to toot my horn too much but I genuinely believe that this hunk of a chapter will keep you guys well-fed once it's out. Editing is still hell and it'll probably be at least a couple months until I start writing Chapter 7, but I will try my absolute hardest to keep the story delivering despite the lack of completely new content.
          
          I still suck at writing announcements so as always, my apologies lol, but if you took some time out of your day to read either this or my book then I thank you very much.  This story means a lot and I want to make sure it's at its absolute best before I continue into the deeper stuff.
          
          Kohan is a lot more interesting and developed, and the other characters that aren't mine I hope I can do them better justice than I did before, Satoru especially. No offense to the guy but it was 100% a mistake on my behalf to not make him more egotistical. He's not asshole, he has a heart, it's just that his ego blinds him sometimes. I dont have too many original characters of my own so its pretty important that I represent these characters similar to how they were intended.
          
          That's all for today folks. Keep living, keep smiling, and I promise to not make you guys wait too long. Cya.

Please forgive me for my tardiness. I was gonna do this yesterday but I got bummed out and couldn't find the motivation to write anything, not even my own book. I'm still the same today but I have enough will to force myself into posting this so uh, yeah.
          
          Anyways though. For the monthly update, Chapter 6's progress has been fine, I guess. It's nearly complete and I just need to finish up on a few scenes and we should be ready to post (that is if editing goes smoothly as well). It's been difficult finding the motivation to write these past few days but I am trying to get something down every day. Life has been an absolute bitch to me and although I am riddled with doubt and insecurity, I'm trying to keep everything I have in tact.
          
          The chapter will be posted when it's finished, despite some of its content being connected to what I have planned for the revamps, stuff that I haven't put on a page yet. It's nothing too major, just a few dialogues and mentions. I thought it'd be cruel of me to make you guys wait even longer for everything else to be revamped so I'll be leaving y'all with something at least.
          
          Speaking of the revamps, I have decided that I will be doing it for all the current chapters, even ones I said that were only getting partial touch-ups like 4 and 5. It'll take a little while for me to move on to truly new content, but I'll probably drop each chapter revamp individually instead of in one single pack like I had planned originally.
          
          This year has been quite the struggle for me so far, and I'm very sorry that I let it impact my writing. Days have been slower, thoughts have been heavier. It's hard trying to balance all this with my own issues and I can't emphasis enough how shitty I feel about forcing you guys to wait longer so I can get my shit together.
          
          Content will come. I just need time. Chapter 6 is nearly complete so look forward to that. I can gurantee that it will come out before the end of the month.
          
          That should be all, I will cya soon. Peace

What on God's green Earth is a panopticon.

I thought it'd be good to do one of those every month so, just so you guys aren't left completely in the dark whenever I go silent. Anyways, not only has it been 7 months since I started writing Macabre Requiem back in august, it's also been 3 godforsaken ones since I first worked on Chapter 6. Really sucks that I've been working on this piece of shit since  December, but just so you guys know, my prediction of when it'll come out before was DEAD FUCKING WRONG, lmao.
          
          Sorry if I sound grittier than usual. Life has been really rough for me these past few months and the fact that this thing has been in my backlog for so long just irks me. I've never been a discipline or responsible person so every time I slack off, or not write as much as I could for my dailt, I just feel like shit and that makes everything worse. Insecurity is a terrible thing that I'm trying to overcome, however, it's quite the arduous journey. Hell, looking back at my older works is what made me want to do all of these revamps and touch-ups, since I just couldn't continue knowing that there were obvious flaws in my work.
          
          As for the schedule, this is all I'll have to do before I can be expected to drop.
          -Revamps of Chapter 6
          -Full revamps of Chapter 1 and Chapter 2
          -and partial revamps of Chapters 3, 4, 5 (scene specific).
          
          I know that I'm just a silly guy on wattpad that can hardly be called an author, hardly be called a writer too tbh, but I genuinely have a story that I want to tell and I can't do that if the beginning of it is riddled with flaws. I'm not entirely sure about it myself, but I'd say the beginning of Macabre Requiem is decently important to the overall story of the book.
          
          So, just to wrap things up, I'm sorry that I always have to keep you guys waiting, and I apologise for going silent for so long yet again. Barely anybody is in my community so I probably sound like I'm talking to no one right now, but I promise to do my best to deliver, even if it takes until May or something lol.

An Update (I'm really bad at doing these announcements lmao):
          
          Sup guys, just coming on here to let you guys know that as of yesterday, the writing stage for Chapter 6: On The Shoulders Of Giants has been completed. Editing will begin tomorrow but as I'm writing, I am currently taking the day off. Progress has been decently smooth all throughout with a few hurdles, but this is only partially the reason why I'm here
          
          Before I get all gloomy again, I'd still like to thank you guys for your continued support on Macabre Requiem. "Support" seems like an overstatement considering how small my page is, but seeing even a single person vote on my book or add to their list warms my heart and makes my day a little better. My days are honestly pretty boring so seeing some action over something I made is really cool. Don't be like EasyQueasy though, otherwise I will crucify since he added my book to a list with MULTIPLE SATORU GOJO X READER FANFICTIONS!!!. Seriously, if you're reading this, I will FUCKING FIND YOU- kidding.
          
          But anyways, the reason I'm here in the first place is that I'd want it to be known that Chapter 6 will be coming out a little later. I realized that some of my older work is not the finest that I'd like to be it, and even some content in Chapter 6 itself needs some revamping. So, what I'm basically saying is that the release will be delayed by at least a month (if everything goes smoothly), but it will be dropping with a lot of extra content, including full revamps of Chapter 1 and Chapter 2, and partial touch-ups on Chapter 3 and Chapter 5. Chapter 4 is the only one safe my wrath since I genuinely feel like that it's my most solid work so far (though that will probably change after Chapter 6 is finished).
          
          I hate to keep you guys waiting, knowing my schedule and all, but I hope you understand that I want my book to be as radiant as possible before I continue. Again, thank you all for your continued patience, and I promise to delivery resplendently. 
          
          Cya✌️

AFTER ALMOST 2 MONTHS OF ABSENCE AND A SHIT LOAD OF DELAYS, CHAPTER 5 OF MACABRE REQUEIM IS OUT! GO READ AND VOTE PLEASE :DDDDDD
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1507909673-macabre-requiem-jujutsu-kaisen-oc-chapter-5

Happy New Years y'all. Chapter 5 drops tomorrow.