Saiyan379

Hiiiii,
          
          I just finished reading the prince book and I loved it! However I see you haven’t touched the second book much & just wanted to know if that was still going to happen and when? I’m itchhhhing to read the rest of the story it’s so good!!

zebee28

Secondly, Nicola's back story lacks a little. I only say this as he has so many peices to him that i feel as though there isnt an understanding of why he does what he does. Yes i get his mother passed away and his relationship with his father is stained but there so much more you can say  about that, make us really feel what going on in his head cause right now i dont really feel him as an individual whos been through pain.  Describe and explore this  it will honestly bring more depth to the charater but also dont fall into the basic pit fall of obviousness and dont make him seem damaged and convoluted cause thats not what he is. Make his pain and past the reasons why he does what he does,  like why he feels responsible for his sisters and the overly protectiveness thing ect. 
          
          With ellora i dont really have much to say tbh.
          
          Lastly please don't let others stop you from doing something you like. Always finish what you start because then you know you completed amazing and nobody can take that away from you. Just because not alot of people comment or read doesn't mean its not a really god book. 
          
          Love Zi.

ReneeJones025

@zebee28 yeah, i can see how this is true. A good challenge for sure, i will have put this in the edit I think there are definitely places where i could go more into his backstory and make him more complex. Thank you for the comments ❤
• Reply

zebee28

I just wanted to say i love your book (The Prince of Ilios). I honestly believe you don't get enough praise and recognotion. Your book has an  intricate plot and almost very tangable characters. You have a great writing style and you dont diviate and add meaningless side stories and characters just to make it "dramatic" or complicated. This i really appriciate.  Plus i really enjoy the dynamic between the two main characters they have a connection that realistic. By this i dont mean the tings and love,  i mean how they interact and how they react to each other. Also, they dont do the typical fall in love straight away or  hate each other straight away. They have many feelings towards each other for many different reasons ( Frustration, admiration, annoyance, confusion) which is understandable.
          Its almost human. These feelings make the characters more than just words on a page as  though i can almost relate to them which is what you want from a book.  
          
          However,  if you don't mind there are some small things you might want to consider. 
          
          Firstly, dont feel the preassure to upload every day because ive began to realise your chapters are shorter and has a lot less content to them. 
          
          That does not lead to a captivating reading experiance as we have so little to read at one time the book feels chopped and interupted especially with how the app throws adds at us all the time. You might want to make them longer as with more in them and this help you expand as a writer as you are challaneged with making different scenes and situations flow together in on chapter. Plus  its keeps reader more hocked as if you read long chapters it makes you mind  really focus on the book.  Plus it makes it easirer to find for favourite moments so you can read them again. Right now with your short chapters its hard. So take your time maybe upload 3 times a week so you have time to make quality chapters.  
          
          Theres a part 2.