Hi. I just wanna say that you are loved. It's okay to not be okay, and that you should reach out to someone. If you cant reach out to a therapist or doctor, then theres this thing called "your life your voice" which is a free service where you can email, text, or call them and a therapist will reply. They helped me through some of my toughest times and would like to share it with others that are going through a hard time. The email is yourlifeyourvoice@boystown.org . Their phone number for calling is +1 800-448-3000, and for texting I think its 20121. They also have an App. There are also other services similar that could help ❤♡