RyGo____

@wyvrnns There aren't a lot of guys like me that are straight for me to hang out with lol
          
          As far as the roles go, finding someone who agrees with my feelings on the matter is impossible really.
          
          I'm fine right now. Sometimes I just kinda get triggered by something and the blackpill sinks in and I spiral and insecurity comes in. And then other times I don't really care at all. It's nice to have some place to vent so that's the only reason I post here. I'm not sui cidal or any thing like that.

I'm not trans at all but I definitely feel like I have gender dysphoria somehow. But also not in a "I wish I was more masculine" kinda way, but the opposite. Yet I definitely don't feel like a girl or want to be seen as a woman by anyone but being seen as a grown man is also incredibly unappealing.
          
          I hate the masculine gender roles/traits/expectations so much and the idea of choosing them causes so much distress and disgust. I'm surely way too old to be this confused about stuff like this as well, right?
          
          Am I making any sense? I feel like nobody has any idea what I'm talking about (including me)
          
          But then again trans people are so relatable in some specific ways too, so maybe I'm onto something?
          
          Then again just me saying that will make some weirdo call me an egg and try to "crack" me or whatever despite the fact that I just explained I have no interest in living as the opposite sex.
          
          Does anybody have a clue what I'm talking about? Or am I just crazy? Maybe both?

I really hate how even in femdom stories or role reversal stories male characters still have to fit into many conventionally/traditionally masculine categories
          
          Like even dominant women still have certain expectations or desires that I could never fulfill.

Thanks for following me.
          Hope you like my stories.
          Always be happy :-)

I'm such an emo lmao 

Man I swear sometimes I feel such a hopeless feeling it's almost like what I hear about gender dysphoria and when I get in these modes it ruins my day.
          
          But like it's not actually gender dysphoria for me.  I'm just sad at social dynamics and the fact that I'm such an outlier and that the type of person I want to have a relationship with simply doesn't exist and the type of relationship I want to have isn't realistically possible.  Like it hurts so much and it's such a stupid thing to be upset about.
          
          Nobody will ever take me out on a date or buy me flowers or cuddle me or make me feel safe or anything like that. And it's all because I was born the wrong sex or orientation to be allowed by the world to experience that.  But I don't want to be a woman and I don't want to be gay either.
          
          It's such a stupid thing but as I get older I think about it a lot more and it weighs on me heavily and I can't stop hating existence for it.  It's embarrassing but I also feel it's unfair.  I can't imagine forcing myself to be more socially dominant or take the initiative in dating or take on a leadership role.  It just feels so wrong it makes me sick to think about.
          
          Am I crazy?

Hi! Sorry if this is sudden but, is there a way i can contact you? (twitter, insta, ...)

Feel so unbalanced some days. 
          
          Sometimes wish I had someone to keep me steady and focused when I begin to slip into the dark.
          
          It takes so long to get back out again.  To be comfortable back in the light.  Not constantly worried I'm a single moment from falling back down.
          
          It would be easier to fight this stupid battle if I didn't fight alone.
          
          Never take your sanity for granted.  Never assume you're safe from random crises or trauma.
          
          Your state of mind, your lucidity, your stability, your ability to reason with yourself, confront emotions with logic, these are precious things.  Appreciate them.  

I still have yet to be femdommed and it's a tragedy 

Thank you so much for your comments and likes on my story❤️ if you have any specific request lmk✨