SHIROblankk

Wondering away in the misery of yesterdays,
          Old mistakes lingering in my head for loves death I do dread.
          One mistake laced in a knot, forever embraced in my lovers heart.
          Lessons learned and forever entangled in knots.
          
          Engraved in stone, in memory of a true love.
          Weaved a web of adultery reality.
          Forgiveness seeks out in the break of dawn,
          now buried in the remnants of a casket forever more.
          
          Death of a once in a life time love,
          taken for granted, by my darkened heart and mind.
          All the pain I could no longer sustain, in another arms I laid
          Wishing it was you my lover, home again forever to stay.
          
          I do know our love is strong and many times gotten us through
          However, I do dread all our love making will now be dead.
          If I could take it back… wash it away… I know I would,
          You claim to forgive me, I just don’t know if I ever could .

I know you, you're a special one
          Some see crazy where I see love
          You fall so low but shoot so high
          Big dreamers shoot for open sky
          So much life in those open eyes
          So much depth, you look for the light
          But when your wounds open, you will cry
          You'll cry out now and you'll question why
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as they fall on down
          I can see your soul grow
          Through the pain as they hit the ground
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as the sun comes out
          As the sun comes out
          I am here and I see your pain
          Through the storms, through the clouds, the rain
          I'm telling you you cannot escape
          You can do it, just feel baby
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as they fall on down
          I can see your soul grow
          Through the pain as they hit the ground
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as the sun comes out
          As the sun comes out
          Here comes the sun
          Smiling down
          Here comes the sun
          Smiling down
          Here comes the sun
          Smiling down
          Smiling down
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as they fall on down
          I can see your soul grow
          Through the pain as they hit the ground
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as the sun comes out
          As the sun comes out
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as they fall on down
          I can see your soul grow
          Through the pain as they hit the ground
          I can see a rainbow
          In your tears as the sun comes out
          As the sun comes out

I love you so very much,
          Even though at times I do things that hurt.
          I try so hard to hope that you always see
          How much you being in my life means to me.
          I am sorry yet again for causing you pain.
          That is the last thing I ever wanted to do.
          Even when I am trying to look out for you and do the right thing,
          I mess up, I am sorry for that too.
          I hope that you still know how much I love and cherish you,
          Like nothing else in my life gives me the thrill of being loved by you.
          So I hope that you listen and see it in my eyes,
          This sincere apology that comes with tears from deep inside.

here's the rest of the story
          
          The child is scared beyond belief. He can’t read the writing on the wall and he knows the man is under his bed. Like any child, he pretends that he slept through the whole thing and hasn’t awoken yet. He lays still as the bodies, quietly hearing the breathes from under his bed.
          
          
          An hour passes, and his eyes are adjusting more and more to the darkness. He tries to make out the words, but it’s a struggle. He gasps when he finally makes out the sentence.
          
          “I know you’re awake”. He feels something shift underneath his bed.

A young boy is sleeping in his bed on a usual night. He hears footsteps outside his door, and peeks out of his eyes to see what is happening. His door swings open quietly to reveal a murderer carrying the corpses of his parents. After silently propping them up on a chair, he writes something on the wall in the blood of the dead bodies. He then hides under the child's bed.

Reality slips far away
          Fiction comes alive as we start to play
          Hope is no more behind a closed door
          As we drift away from where we were before
          Hope and hopelessness become one
          It’s all meaningless we’ve already begun
          We are all one in the same
          Never opposites when we play the same game
          
          We walk a thin line between hope and despair
          Running from the truth but it’s already here
          Told so many lies I don’t know if they can find me
          Only one life to live so choose wisely
          Heads or tails?
          Do you even know what side you’re on?
          Does it really matter if it’s on the same coin?
          If you wanna achieve you gotta believe
          The time is right now there’s the door here’s the key
          
          Just gotta chase the pain away
          Let it fade away
          There’s a ray of hope beyond despair
          Move on – Look for the truth in this world
          Break through the confusion
          Find a solution
          Beat the twisted evil things
          Just do it, go for it
          
          Never say never
          Never say never
          Never say never
          
          Break through the confusion
          Find a solution
          Beat the twisted evil things
          Just do it, go for it
          
          Never..

It's the same each and every night
          Glare at my screen with two big bloodshot eyes
          I'm stuck self-torturing
          My meds are failing me
          Internal clock in smithereens
          Can't fix this,
          I'm hopeless
          My eyes are stapled open wide
          As I lay down on my side
          I am bouncing off these walls
          Notice my hands begin to twitch
          Unprovoked assaulting of my conscious wit
          Me and the TV are enemies
          Sickening static surrounds my mind
          I'm losing time
          And realizing that after days of thought that
          I'm stuck self-torturing
          My meds are failing me
          Internal clock in smithereens
          Can't fix this
          I'm hopeless
          My eyes are stapled open wide
          As I lay down on my side
          I am bouncing off these walls
          As I focus on the clock
          Time stands still, but I cannot
          I should strap myself in bed
          I guess I'll sleep when I am dead
          Talk to myself,
          Lie in the darkness so content
          As the sun begins to rise
          I can barely shut my eyes
          This crazed, delirious mess
          Laughing at everything I see
          My sanity is spent
          Just tell me where my time went
          I'm losing it
          Attention: All insomniacs, please raise your right hand
          And kindly, repeat after me
          "I GUESS I'LL SLEEP WHEN I AM DEAD!"
          'Cause I'm stuck self-torturing
          My meds are failing me
          Internal clock in smithereens
          Can't fix this
          I'm hopeless
          My eyes are stapled open wide
          As I lay down on my side
          I am bouncing off these walls
          As I focus on the clock
          Time stands still, but I cannot
          I should strap myself in bed
          I guess I'll sleep when I am dead
          I guess I'll sleep when I am

When I look at you,
          It makes my heart overwhelmed with love
          flowing from my spirit through my itty bitty tiny veins.
          
          The glow that your face gives
          when I look into your eyes
          as I stare at you,
          it's like your love
          for me spells out in the air saying
          baby, I will always be there.
          
          Thinking 'bout that day when we met,
          it was like we were meant for one another...
          The way we connected,
          the thoughts we shared,
          the love we showed,
          if only everybody could see and know that
          my heart is a passionate reflection of you
          that no one can ever undo.
          
          My passionate heart...
          It cries for you,
          but only if you knew
          that my passionate heart is
          a reflection of how I feel about you.

It makes me happy just being by your side.
          All these feelings I just can't hide.
          You'll always be in my heart.
          Can't bear the pain when we are apart.
          Nobody is as special as you are to me.
          I hope you are beginning to see
          Just how much I care for you,
          And all my feelings will always be true.
          I can't describe how much I care,
          But when you need me, I'll be there
          To wipe those tears when you are sad,
          To make you happy when you are mad.
          All these things I can really do.
          Just remember I'm thinking of you!

todays me and my best boyfriend ever two month anniversary