So the 19th was my golden birthday. I turned 19. The thing is, nobody really cared. My family didn't want to celebrate, and my dad was in jail. All I wanted was for him to get out. When I realised he wasn't going to on my birthday, all I wanted was to talk to him. So my friend was nice enough to put 10 dollars on for me to talk to him. When he actually called me, he told me his bail dropped to 200 dollars. He was just asking me about if I got birthday money and if I could use it to bail him out. I actually thought he was wanting to talk to me for me, and not for my money. He never once said happy birthday on that call. I instantly regretted wanting him to call. He called me later that night and I said I was mad at him for not even saying happy birthday and making it about money and himself and he just said sorry and that he was so excited about his bail dropping down that he forgot to say happy birthday but that it was on his mind the entire call. That doesn't help. I am upset because I can never get that day back. There are other birthdays, but there will never be another golden birthday. This marks the 6th birthday in a row that left me depressed and hopeless that the next year will be any better. It is hard enough that my mom isn't in my life anymore, then not having him and the way he treated me just made it worse. He did get out yesterday, a friend bailed him out. It's just not the same a day after than it would have been on my birthday. Sorry if this seems selfish. I know people think well be grateful he got out the day after. Or be grateful your friend celebrated with you. It's just hard to be happy. Thanks for listening. Sorry it's so long...
