Trash

Thailand good. America bad.

Thailand 

YES I DELETED MY TXT FANFIC
          
          NO I'M PROBABLY NOT GOING WRITE ANYTHING ANY TIME SOON

It's 2022 now y'all

Other STAYs probably already noticed this but I JUST realized that the album cover for NOEASY hides the word "noisy"
          There's no point to this but I'm still announcing it-

I uh... Merry... Merry Christmas... Two days later...
          In my defense, I got a new phone and I had to sign in again...
          Sorry...
          Um...
          Yeah...
          Hehe... 

I am so close to just giving up on America. This place is so fucked. I'd rather be an idol trainee than live here. I'd rather be dead, but that's something I shouldn't say for fear of my mom pushing religion on me again.
          
          I hate America so much and I'm disappointed that it's pretty much the only place I can live comfortably other than Canada. The Olympics jacked up the price of living in many countries, and are tryna jack up LA, too. My city is better than most cities, but I still have to follow the rules of America, which sucks balls.
          
          I wish I could just go to sleep and wake up in a better country. I don't care if I have to learn a new language. I'm already learning Latin and Japanese and I wanna learn Thai if I find a good and free app for it.
          
          Why did I have to be born in such a fucked up time, though? It sucks. Like sure, it's better than the past, but it still sucks ass. I can't go anywhere or do anything unless I jump though every hoop perfectly, I'm not allowed to mess up cause I'm a minority and I have to represent everyone in my race, everyone with the same sexuality as me, everyone in the LGBTQ+ community and prove to the straight white cis men that I'm good enough and that I have what it takes to be someone and that I'm worthy of their praise.
          
          Fuck shit. I don't have to prove shit. Lemme be whatever I want. Don't push away my work just cause I'm black. Don't push away my work just cause I'm gay. Don't push away my work just cause I'm trans. If you don't like me cause of that than fuck you. You can go fuck off and lollygag in your little white supremecy circle. I don't care. My shit isn't for you, so fuck off.
          
          Fuck America. 

I'm mad. Wanna know why I'm mad? Cause I wanna make music. That's all I wanna do. But I have to make money, too. That's BS. Cause musicians make money, but not off their music. They make money off of products that they sell. They have to sell out in order to make a good amount of money. And I don't wanna do that. The music industry is just so fucked cause all the companies wanna take all the money from the musicians, who are doing the real work. The companies are just selling them. The artists are making the music, writing the lyrics and the melodies, and performing it, but they don't get shit from their own product.
          
          And it's not like I even wanna make money off of music. I wanna make music cause I like it. It's the only medium I feel relief in. I'm only ever calm when there's music around. I only wanna make music, no strings attached, but that's a shit job. I have to be popular and sell to do that. Even with streaming services, I'd make next to nothing with my music. I'd need my music to be streamed hundreds, maybe thousands of times in order to make a dollar. The music industry in America is so fucked up.
          
          I'm not quitting music, though. If that's how it's gonna be, then fine. I'll play by their rules.

Update: I really haven't been writing lately. In fact, I've given up writing. I only chose writing cause I thought a career in music would be too out of reach for me but it turns out music is pretty fitting for me considering it's all I do. I admire soundtracks and even add them to my own stories. Not to mention I get jealous of every artist that goes on tour wishing I could do that. So, I'm probably not gonna update any stories for a long while. I'm honestly just not feeling it. 

KPOP IS GETTING MORE METAL
          
          HAVE YOU LISTENED TO ENHYPEN'S NEW ALBUM AND TXT IS STARTING TO GAIN MORE OF A ROCK SOUND