SayHiStories
There was days I think of things and situations that changed me…Changes that are both good and bad yet couldn’t be help…. Changes people always pointed out, and changes even they don’t tell I noticed and realized myself… At night, at some nights I try to pounder harder than usual within me, “What’s wrong with me?” Why I keep on changing…. How my lips talk… how my mind thinks… and how even my body react at simple things… how gentleness and warmth in my heart, continuously turning cold as ice transitioning to stone for people around me I used to treasure and care like fragile glass afraid to break them. “You…you…” I still remember how that conversation started, after seeing the man I ever loved in the street one year after we broke up…
SayHiStories
His eyes were gentle as he met mine that has nothing but blankness, as it sunk to him, unfamiliarity while he looks at me slowly built up till he was lost figuring me out like puzzle. As he stares at me more, “You did changed,” he said that made my heart triggered not surprisingly in aggressive way, but wondering way… ‘Thanks to you.’ I didn’t know how that thoughts formed into my mind as my lips held back not to blurt it out, how I just nodded as I replied “People supposed to.” And gave an empty smile as I walk passed by him. Tears escaped my eyes as I walk away, biting my lips afraid to lose within the battle of emotions inside me… My heart were never not heavy since the day he played me… since he took everything away from me and left me heartless and soul-less after he was done with me. I still feel betrayed how the man I ever loved betrayed me in the most unimaginable way of turning your back to someone. How he cheated on me when he said I was his everything, the life and world he found when he couldn’t find another reason to stay in here… My chest clasps, but I remained unbothered used to it… Seeing him, made me want to blame him for the changes that happened, it made me want to blame him why my hearts and soul turns like this. “It’s always the one you love the most who makes painful and unforgettable betrayal.” And perhaps this changes were all because of him… They were the one to blame. - To Love Second Time Around
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