Sayorikamin

Testing out the start of a Natsuri story, let me know if I should do it. (This starts with Natsuki.)
          	
          	Me and my little brother Haru were sitting outside a run-down gas station, we had just escaped our abusive father. Both of us were covered in bruises and gashes; every car that drove by triggered my paranoia; I thought every singular one was my father, but the last thing I knew as I snuck my brother out of there, my father was asleep on the couch. I moved my brother closer to me as a sharp gust of wind hit us. I was about to speak when I got a call. I gulped and reached into our duffle bag, I pulled out my small, half-broken phone and answered the call.
          	
          	"Where the hell are you?!" I hear my father shout on the other end of the phone. My hands trembled, and I felt myself failing to keep the phone still. "O...out." I say quietly, almost as quiet as a whisper. "If you and that little brat don't get back here, I will track you dow-" The line cut, thank the lord for this gas stations shitty cell service.
          	
          	"How much longer? It's getting cold." My brother Haru asked as he looked up at me. Who am I kidding? I'm a teenager alone with a kid, we don't even have coats or clothes that fit us properly. It's better if we just go back. But looking at my brother, the bruises lining his cheek. I knew I couldn't take him back there. But what was I going to do? That's when a car pulled up, I felt my heart racing faster as I kept my brother behind me.

Sayorikamin

Testing out the start of a Natsuri story, let me know if I should do it. (This starts with Natsuki.)
          
          Me and my little brother Haru were sitting outside a run-down gas station, we had just escaped our abusive father. Both of us were covered in bruises and gashes; every car that drove by triggered my paranoia; I thought every singular one was my father, but the last thing I knew as I snuck my brother out of there, my father was asleep on the couch. I moved my brother closer to me as a sharp gust of wind hit us. I was about to speak when I got a call. I gulped and reached into our duffle bag, I pulled out my small, half-broken phone and answered the call.
          
          "Where the hell are you?!" I hear my father shout on the other end of the phone. My hands trembled, and I felt myself failing to keep the phone still. "O...out." I say quietly, almost as quiet as a whisper. "If you and that little brat don't get back here, I will track you dow-" The line cut, thank the lord for this gas stations shitty cell service.
          
          "How much longer? It's getting cold." My brother Haru asked as he looked up at me. Who am I kidding? I'm a teenager alone with a kid, we don't even have coats or clothes that fit us properly. It's better if we just go back. But looking at my brother, the bruises lining his cheek. I knew I couldn't take him back there. But what was I going to do? That's when a car pulled up, I felt my heart racing faster as I kept my brother behind me.