It's painful to see Grayson Dolan almost cry because of hate comments, it's painful to think I'm just another fan, and that I mean nothing to him personally. He will never feel for me the way I feel for him, he'll never hold me like I want him to. He'll never kiss me, under the porch light, on my front porch. He won't text me, asking to hang out. He won't call me after he gets home from tour or Cali or wherever he visits for his fans. Ethan and him won't watch movies at my house, while we laugh and giggle and throw popcorn at each other. I won't ever feel his strong, sturdy hands hold mine. I can't help that I've fallen for him, but I honestly wouldn't go back and stop it either.
I'm praying for at least one chance to actually talk to him, for more than a couple minutes, if only for 4 hours, I would be content, and that's all I want for now.