SewDa_Pop
Cool cool cool just had a near carbind monoxide poisoning event lol
So glad the fire/carbon monoxide alarm is battery powered
SewDa_Pop
SewDa_Pop
So Hurricane Beryl will be hitting my area soon. I don't know if anyone who reads this believes in a higher being, but prayers would be very much appreciated. I really hope we don't end up with terrible flooding like before. I don't want to evacuate, especially with my dog AND cat. I've packed up an emergency bag and readied the carriers for the babies (cat and dog) but I'm unhappy about possibly losing the rest of things I own...like I barely held on to a fraction of what I had before I moved here and now I might just lose it all. :(
P.S. I really should've learned how to swim, huh?
SewDa_Pop
Waiting Room by Real Friends was just too heartbreaking for me to hear the day before my mom's one year death anniversary. July 1st has passed now, but it's been a melancholy day anyways. That song was just not something I was expecting. It was just a little too close to home I think
SewDa_Pop
My dog wanted to potty very late in the night and I'm really happy I stayed up longer than usual for it. Was I little annoyed to leave my cozy bed for the wet night scenery outside? Yeah, a bit, but in the end it was worth it. I finally saw the moon again. The trees and buildings around my home usually block my view of it and I just happened to be outside with the correct timing in a while. Why is this so important to me?
My mom always said the mom was her best friend and always watching over her. She'd greet it and sometimes song to it, so now I can't help but associate the moon with her. I think a lot of people do that with their passed loved ones, if I'm being honest.
Anyways, I saw the moon tonight and cried and some of those tears were more happy than sad. Have a good day everyone
SewDa_Pop
My friend (she lost her dad when she was thirteen and now she's 31) told me that the feeling of looking for that person, the loss and subsequent grief, will come and go like the ocean's tide. I lost my mom this July and I didn't understand her until then. It doesn't matter how much time you think you've spent with them, it never feels like enough once they leave. I couldn't fathom a world that she no longer existed in, I still can't honestly. Knowing she's not walking this Earth while I am is so hard. Knowing I won't hear her laugh or hear her singing or just a cough... It hurts.
SewDa_Pop
@kandycemt thank you. Yesterday was actually my mom's birthday. I can't tell you how much comfort your words give me. I'm lucky to have siblings (especially my twin) who also struggled yesterday, but your words do make me feel better. I'm sorry that you too have had to experience grief like this. Thank you again P.S. You are so eloquent! I'll hold your words close, especially on the days when it's just a little too hard to keep going. And I'm also grateful for your books, I love reading them and they bring me joy.
kandycemt
@SewDa_Pop I lost my mother back in June of 2018 and this feeling stays. You live your life, but your mother will always be there on the fringe, always on your mind. It's still unfathomable to me how my own mother had been so bouncy and happy one day and in a coma within a week. There are always these things that take place in my life and my children's lives and there's this constant tenure in my mind that she should be here, she should have been a part of this. Life goes on, the ache becomes manageable, but it never really goes away. And there is part of me that finds comfort in her constant memory, even though it took me a long time to be able to move on from the raw pain of it during the first couple of years. I'm so sorry that you are going through this. There are no words that can make things better, all we can do is offer ears and friendly hands. Sometimes, the most helpful thing is knowing you aren't alone. That your pain is understood. While your grief is still unique to you since no one had the same relationship with your mother that you had, there are others who also feel the grief of losing those that are at the very core of their existence. My most deepest condolences. I hope you find peace and always know that you are never alone.
AJGrahamWrites
Thank you so much for reading/voting for Eternal Sunshine. I really hope it's a story you've enjoyed. :)
SewDa_Pop
@AJGrahamWrites I absolutely loved it. I wish it could be adapted into a show it's so good. Thank you for writing it.
myIDEYA
Thank you for the follow! ❤️
SewDa_Pop
July 1st ~9:20 am. 2023
That's when my mom died.
That's when I lost my footing..
SewDa_Pop
So, I got in car wreck last night. No one got hurt, but the other car slammed into my passenger side and now my doors over there won't really open, and my car is still drivable. I'm so bummed out right now. Like I keep dreaming of it happening and can't really sleep. I'm also really afraid to drive again. I have to drive though, there's no way to get it of it. I have a job and I can't not drive. Why do other people suck? Why did this have to happen on a day that was already pretty sucky? I feel cheated somehow.
SewDa_Pop
OKAY. So I thought I'd made it through the thick of it! I didn't! The breathing problem is BACK!
I can't even sleep because of this constant struggle to breathe and having to cough. EATING felt like I was suffocating