Carl Candy

Your New here Arn't You?

My lamp wife left me!!  Can someone PLEASE comfort me during this hard time in my life?  I'm begging you!  I'm soooo lonely!  All of my children are deflating and I don't know what to do!  I need my cheating lamp wife right now.

Kim Kardashian is my hero.  Anyone wanna talk? ;)  I'm so lonely.  My lamp wife is away for the night and two of my water balloon children popped.  I just really need a friend right now! :'(  My therapist won't answer my five calls!  HELP ME NOW.
          
          SOS

I'm a proud pony.....

My mama told me when I was young, we're all born super stars.
          She rolled my hair and put my lipstick on, in the cap of her boudoir. 
          There's nothing wrong with loving who you are, she said, cuz he made you perfect babe. So hold your head up gurl and you'll go far, listen to me when I say.....
          IM BEAUTIFUL IN MY WAY
          CUZ GOD MAKES NO MISTAKES
          IM ON THE RIGHT TRACK BABY
          I WAS BORN THIS WAY.

Will someone please tell me why my children are water balloons?