ShawnNess

@ms1beas The story is great, right up my ally as well. Do you use a Word program and then cut and paste it here? If not it might be a place to start. Conversations should still have capitalization. "Well, I thought, that was great." You are missing a few words here and there, sometimes there are areas where better wording can easily get a point across where sometimes I had to stop and decipher what was said. Finally there are a few times where you basically said the same thing 3 different ways in three consecutive sentences. Please don't take the above to heart or as criticism you asked for help and I am happy to give you my thoughts. Take Care.

ShawnNess

@ms1beas The story is great, right up my ally as well. Do you use a Word program and then cut and paste it here? If not it might be a place to start. Conversations should still have capitalization. "Well, I thought, that was great." You are missing a few words here and there, sometimes there are areas where better wording can easily get a point across where sometimes I had to stop and decipher what was said. Finally there are a few times where you basically said the same thing 3 different ways in three consecutive sentences. Please don't take the above to heart or as criticism you asked for help and I am happy to give you my thoughts. Take Care.

ShawnNess

@iloveyou52 Hello I have enjoyed a lot of your work, I just have not had the chance to comment on any others. My favorite is the start of your work-a-day heroine. I came to Wattpad to try and enjoy new, young authors and ended up with teen txt talk and a bunch of "am I hot or not" contests. While your work does have txt talk in it the occurrences are minimal. I'm guessing by the way you write you are in early high school so that propensity wil subside with some creative writing classes. So I've enjoyed your work keep it up, I do have two books published myself so I know the pains, take care.