Shiny

Hello people! I know probably no one reads these anymore, especially after pixie smashed her phone or wtv, but I like being able to vent here anyway!
          
          So, as stated previously, I’m now lesbian. And yeah, that was hard to admit to myself, especially when I was so “in love” with chocolate.
          But now I like a girl, who is so much kinder, gentler, beautiful, and overall just an amazing person! Yall know her as A, and I’m not saying chocolate wasn’t any of those things, I was just never physically attracted to him, I was more attracted to the IDEA of him.
          Now, I will say this whole liking A situation SUCKS! Not because she’s a bad person or anything, that couldn’t be farther from the truth, but it’s because she’s such a good person! And you wouldn’t think that was a bad thing, BUT IT ISSSSSSS!!!
          Like- A likes another girl, a girl who is also my friend, one of my favorites actually (hi wife, if you’re reading this) and my friend is straight! There’s nothing wrong with that, of course, but A still likes her (I think) and I’m happy for her. Truly, I love seeing A so happy around her! And that’s the part that kills me, is that I wouldn’t want to take that away from her. Not that they wouldn’t still be best friends and still love each other the way they do, but I’d still feel sooooo guilty.
          But seriously A is so frickin amazing and wonderful and adorable and beautiful! We were walking into an assembly on Tuesday and she grabbed my hand, intertwined our fingers, and said “so you don’t get lost.” LIKE GIRL- STOP! I genuinely can’t tell if she was flirting because me, her, and our friend hold hands all the time, but not like that! And when I showed up for a little party/get-together situation at the local park, she ran up to me super excited and gave me a hug! She does that with a lot of people but it really was super sweet!
          And if only you guys could see a picture of her because she really is SOOOOO pretty! But obviously I’m not gonna do that because that’s her privacy!

I’m baaaaackkk!!! Guess who has more drama? Me! (Wife 1, if you are reading this, GO AWAY. Luv u<3)
          
          I think I’ve mentioned I little birdie named Raquel before, though she wasn’t that important, but NOW?! Ohhh I was soooo close to getting suspended for battery because of her…(I wasn’t ACTUALLY gonna do anything btw)
          
          So, I’m lesbian, right? So I have a lesbian pin on my bag! And I also have the bi pin on my bag, because I USED to be bisexual! No biggie, it’s just pins, right?
          
          Well not to Raquel. She came up to me and told me that I couldn’t have those pins on my bag and started policing my label and telling me that I’m not lesbian and I’m just Sapphic (all lesbians are sapphic btw) and started calling me homophobic and misogynistic.
          
          I turned my back, ignoring the ignorant person (Raquel) yapping behind me, however I was visibly upset, so! You know that friend I said I had a crush on last post? Yeah? Her being the absolute QUEEN that she is, stepped in and started defending me (Best friend ever)
          
          And THEN the next period, Raquel called A, my friend, a “Wh*re,” “self centered,” and a “controlling b!tch.”
          
          I did NOT let that slide and me, Wife 1, and A, all reported her for harassment and bullying :3 she’s getting reprimanded on Monday, I can’t wait!!!
          
          I HATE her with a PASSION! I might even hate her more than Strawberry atp… I lowk didn’t care about the homophobic/misogynistic comments, but when she talked to A like that, THATS when I had a problem!
          
          Oh and we converted Wife 2 to the rehab side of Raquel’s “friendship”! She doesn’t like her anymore :3 I’m so happy!

Hey peopleeee!!! I’m baaaaack! Sorry it’s been so long, I’ve been busy and life has been moving very fast! Just a quick catch up:
          
          April I went through an identity crisis! You know how I was saying I was “in love” with chocolate?! My best friend?! The one who I still do love dearly?! The one who’s a man?! TURNS OUT IM LESBIAN!!!! YAYAYAY! (Except not yay because I told my friends I had a crush on him but now I’m fully gay… mind you I now have a crush on one of those friends…)
          
          AND! My mother has been hating me a lot more recently! For Mother’s Day I cleaned the entire house and she gave everyone a hug and said I love you to them…except me. Who cleaned the entire house. The filthy, disgusting house, that is never cleaned, ever. A lot more happened with that but I don’t wanna get into it rn…
          
          Oh and last week! May 24, 2026, at 12pm, my cat died! Yaaaaaay :,) not Lacie, not the one on my banner, my other one. The one that was perfectly healthy and beautiful and looked like he could live at LEAST five more years, was suddenly diagnosed with stage 4 kidney disease on May 22nd (my sisters birthday, while I was at my aunts house, avoiding my sister because she was coming over for her birthday. At 12pm I then got the call saying he was dying)
          
          Oh and this entire week my mother has been pissed at me for not going to school (my brother Kevyn just left and my cat just died and I’ve been having really bad ptsd) and she caused the worst panic attack of my life and didn’t even bother apologizing :D yayyyy (kill me) in fact, instead of apologizing, when I tried to explain to her what she had done (very respectfully btw) she took my phone and iPad… the only time she’s ever done that btw and it’s when SHE needs to take accountability for something, but she made it seem like it was my fault…
          
          So if you’re wondering how I’ve been the past couple of months, absolutely fucking terrible! Especially the last month. I hate life. I love you all though, and I miss my wattpad community! :3

Yall I just got done reading one of the best fics I’ve ever read in my life :,) it’s so good, it’s called Hearts Don’t Break Around Here, and of course it’s Klance! It literally took me like six months of on and off reading but I got it done and it’s beautiful!! GO READ IT, NOW!!! (Also there’s one last chapter on ao3 if you’re reading on here and it’s amazing!)

I’ve officially lost my shit. I told my mom and wife 1 (sorry wife if you’re seeing this) that I had a migraine to stay home from school today. Really I’m just tired and can’t stop thinking about life. I’m still really giddy about the Conan Gray concert but I’m also getting really stressed about my feelings xd
          
          Like- I’ve liked chocolate since September 1st 2023 at 12:43 am (well, realized). But now idk…I still love him as a friend, he’s probably my favorite person in the world, but idk…I think I only like women? Maybe? Idkkkkkkk!!! I hate ts…why can’t I just know?!
          
          Sometimes I still have feelings for him but they’ve been coming and going as of late…idk what’s happening xd I hate being a teenager. STUPID HORMONES!!!

Yall im so happy :3 i got to see CONAN LEE GRAYYYYYY!!!! On Monday! Chocolate took me! He left halfway through because his mom is strict, so I was then left alone in Seattle all by myself but that’s okay!!! I had an amazing time and didn’t get kidnapped!!!! :3 I literally have not been happier!
          
          Also, completely off topic but FUCK SEXUALITY!!! Atp I’m following Conan and being unlabeled because omg it’s so confusing!!! I swear I’m bisexual but recently I’ve been feeling more attracted to women and the ONLY man that I’ve EVER felt attracted to (elementary school crushes don’t count) is Chocolate. WHYYYYYYYYY!!! Ugh- I hate life…but I also love it because I SAW CONAN GRAYYYYYYYYYY LIVE OMGGGGGG!!!

Yall im about to do an interview thing for my school (it’s called ignite the future, basically just prepares us for getting jobs) but I insanely sick and keep feeling like im going to throw up… hopefully i dont throw up while taking my interview…

Happy international women’s day lovelies!!!

Is it just me or do yall view altea as this beautiful world where everything is perfect. Like I see it as being gay is just normal and labels aren’t needed and s,a is basically unheard of and everyone is equal regardless of skin tone, accent, gender, ect.
          
          Like just imagine being trans but when you’re on altea you’re just like “yeah I’m the opposite gender now” AND NO ONE CARES! That would be beautiful. Dang now I wanna live on altea…

Yall help. I love women so much it frikin hurts but I still like Chocolate. HELPPP. Like I can’t be lesbian cause I like him but he’s literally the ONLY man I’ve ever been attracted to that isn’t an animated character.
          
          If I didn’t like him most of my problems would just fade away, yet here we are. WHYYYYYYYY!