Shits_and_Gigs_LLC

@SamuGodoy1907 Honestly we didn't make it that far in the anime to have all the context for how Togas quirk does that but we can safely say that it will not work like that in our story. 
            
            Of the two of us one is a massive nerd when it comes to science and biology, so to them it's really important that thing make sense. They don't have to be realistic but they need to make sense, that is actually why Izuku can't have whatever quirk he wants. We didn't explain the mechanics of Izuku's quirk in the story but it works by changing his DNA to have whatever traits he wants, but if he changes his DNA to have another quirk, he would no longer have his original and therefore he would be unable to change it back. Toga would have a different mechanism where she exudes a slime with the DNA she consumes so she can have multiple different DNA strands stored somewhere she can switch between whenever she changes herself.  
            
            Besides if she was able to transfer consciousness that gets into whole set of complicated questions like: How does consciousness relate to DNA? Would there be a copy of said consciousness in another person and how would it evolve within that person if Toga was still alive and evolving herself? How can a consciousness which now lives in another brain have senses not coming to that brain? What even is consciousness? How do you transfer something like consciousness? All of which could definitely be ignored if you wanted to and honestly it probably should be but again science nerd so no way something this unanswerable makes it into the fic. Not saying it's a bad idea, in fact we think it's really good it just doesn't make scientific sense. 
            
            We really do appreciate your idea. You are one of the only people that has enough interest in the story to ask about something other then sex and you made one of us able to nerd out about some details earlier than expected so thank you! And if you still have any other ideas pleas tell us about them!

And, of course, he would also have a "ghost" that could observe his surroundings without anyone noticing Himiko—and perhaps, if you decide so, he could even possess her Quirk.

I would also suggest your main character  having more impact in the story, maybe whoever replaces Izuku is actually a mage/ whatever that has mostly useless magic but he uses it to help his parents for something and discovers that he can use it to save people?  I'm not over exuberating in the slightest when I say if you tweak some details and maybe change the setting and add some characters you would have an amazing story outline for a book. 
            
            4. Some material that might help better understand what I am talking about. So I Obviously don't know much about you but I do know you have a really good idea and I would like to suggest some media that would give you a good idea at how to refine this idea as well as future ones that you might think of. First I think Something like Monster (anime/manga) or Death Note (anime/manga) are really good at showing characters and their interactions, especially when you need to read between the lines. Death Note is particularly good at this as it has no traditional good guys in it. Every single character does something bad and it is the readers job to determine who is right if anyone at all, this also plays into the main theme of the story. Monster is more geared to human psychology and general character writing but it keeps you asking questions about the character the entire time. V for Vendetta (comic/ movie) also has incredible characters but the main reason I am recommending it is because it deals with a political uprising viewed through a modern lens and it relates to modern issues so I thought it might help this idea specifically when it comes to learning about humans and how they operate there is almost nothing better than Bluelock (anime is okay but manga is better), it deals with tones of concepts dealing with what makes humans humans specifically through sports but they can be applied anywhere. Finally Watchman(Movie/comic) deals with what a modern superhero society would be like and I thing could help with this idea a lot.

-Something like forced quirk breeding is incredibly ineffective and I doubt that governments would be doing it. It took Endeavor like 12 years to get what he wanted. It is more economical to simply let the population do it's thing and then pluck the strongest kids. 
            -If one country somehow gained a bunch more gold/wealth all of the other countries would definitely notice and become suspicious. They could also not really be housed in 3rd world countries because they would be easy targets then.  
            -Painting all underground heroes as good is disingenuous. In your world they might be more likely to be good but the Commission would also need people in the shadows to do things they don't want the public to find out. 
            
            3. What I think you should do for an original story. More or less not much, if you replace things like AFO and quirks with things like The Necromancer and magic boom you did it. I still think that some of the realistic focused things I told you about  an MHA fic would be good to implement, especially if you'd consider a modern stetting like that of MHA. Stuff like "what would the other countries do when they realized that their magic users were having their magic stolen" is something you should consider no matter the setting. Although the fantasy nerds always want their worlds to operate under strict rules of nature/ magic so do be careful if needed. If you go with this you would also not need to worry about the character issues concerning AFO because whatever character would replace them wouldn't have any of these issues. I do think you should still consider the characters motivation for stealing other peoples magic though. I think it would still be unnecessary to mention the race inspiration, I think you could work it into the undertones though as a message to the reader.

-In such a system either nearly 90% (if this is still in the early days of quirks where most are quirkless) or nearly 70% (if 20% of the population in quirkless and most quirks are like that we see in the show) of the population would be considered slaves and that is an unmanageable number for any country. 
            -Even with the "Heros" pretending things are okay there would be many countries and especially people within the oppressive countries that would stand up up for the oppressed people. Just like there are in real life. 
            -The mention of race is unnecessary for an MHA fic. Also that kind of narrative isn't as unilateral as some might think. Race is very common in such narratives (especially in the western narratives) but so is religion and disabilities. 
            -If there is so few of the lower rung as you described then there would be almost no slaves meaning that the oppressive countries would function much harder. 
            -Since the most likely people to rebel are the quirkless and mutant quirked it  would not make sense for the countries to implement the rule about not being allowed to use quirks because none of the quirkless and the mutants would not need to train their quirks at all. 
            -Over all the manifest is good but I'm not sure why izuku would publish it necessarily I don't think it would make a difference in a world so dark. Also this sounds way too much like Stains manifesto so I would suggest chaining it up, maybe focusing less on the Hero aspect of it and more on the government aspect. Also not sure about Moonfish but in canon I'm pretty confident that (at least before the anther decided to make her a good guy)Togas psychopathy is supposed to flued her need for blood it was only spurred on by her quirk requiring it but it was not the root cause of it. And I can maybe give it to you on toga not killing people but some one like Moonfish or even Dabi have 100% killed and that was not justified.