Onyx

OMGOMGOMG EPIC THE ITHACA SAGA IS PEAK I WILL NEVER LISTEN TO ANYTHING ELSE EVER AND THE LiVE YESTERDAY WAS SO SILLY GOOFY I LOVE THE CAST SM

My friend basically just called me a rude little bitch cuz I have feelings >w< like they got mad at me yesterday for something I don’t even know what like we barely saw each other all day that can’t be enough time for me to mess something up. And then today we were talking in one of our gc’s and then bro started yelling at me cuz I posted smth about this kid in our friend group I don’t really like (I didn’t even say names or anything) and then now they were talking about how I was being rude to them and our other friends. Like I haven’t changed at all I don’t know what bro is talking about like I’m sorry for expressing my feelings? I get I’m the problem but damn and I asked them what I did wrong and who was mad at me but they just didn’t respond and I don’t wanna just straight up stop talking to all of them cuz then I’ll be alone and if I’m alone I’ll just get bullied more and I don’t know what to do anymore everyone pisses me off on astronomical levels

Hear me out.. Fitzgerald for president. He will save us trust. MAKE AMERICA RICH AGAINNNNNN ‼️‼️‼️‼️

I have work to do but it’s like 10 pm and I’m tireddddd but if I don’t do it I’ll get screamed at n prolly get detention :P I hate everything. School is NOT dangerous

TW topics of SH and suicide 
          I know this is a wild thing to be talking about on an app like this but I was just trying to go to sleep cuz it’s like 11:30 which isn’t that late but I was tired sue me and like as soon as I closed my eyes I was reminded of every single mistake I’ve made which I know is pretty common but every time I close my eyes it’s just regrets pain a quick reminder that all of this is for nothing. That there’s truly no purpose in living if we’re all going to die so cold and alone. If I want to live I need pain. It’s like a rush of adrenaline. Of peace. I regret being put on this earth in the first place. It’s not like it’s my fault. If I was never born i wouldn’t be able to hurt anyone. They wouldn’t care if I never existed. But now that i’m here and they might actually care about me I want to move so far away from these people. My friends. My family. I don’t want to hurt them. I don’t want them to be sad when I’m gone. I don’t feel secure in my own flesh. Like my skeleton wants to leave my very own body. I want to be better but there’s bo way to flip the way I think. I could go to therapy or something but would that really do anything? If I don’t open up nothing will help so what am I supposed to do?? I feel like I need to be on a suicide watch or something. Not like I’d actually kill myself. Not yet at least. I have gotten close to overdosing a couple times. SH is common. I just want to be better. I don’t want to be this way I want to be able to make others happy. I don’t want them to have to deal with my problems. I wish I could just close my eyes and feel safe.
          
          
          
          
          Anyways have you guys ever heard of epic the musical? 10/10 definitely listen to it also if jay doesn’t release the ithica saga on Christmas  anyways here the link LISTEN TO ITTT  https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbqsLXjyXw3iDPFOcGU13VL0E7lEtlup7

⚠️⚠️‼️I have a very important announcement chat..‼️‼️⚠️⚠️
          
          
          nya ichi ni san nya arigato!
          
          
          This has been a public service announcement brought to you by me  have a nice day  girls, gays, and theys

Percy Jackson and the olympians book 3 the titans curse chapter 14 “I have a dam problem”, page 208
          
          Thalias expression darkened. I could tell that she’d come here before hoping for exactly that— some kind of sign from her dad. Some connection. "No. They don't do anything. They're just big metal statues."
          I thought about the last big metal statue we'd run into.
          That hadn't gone so well. But I decided not to bring it up.
          "Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."
          Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"
          Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?"
          "Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."
          Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom."
          Maybe it was the fact that we were so tired and strung out emotionally, but I started cracking up, and Thalia and Grover joined in, while Zoë just looked at us. "I do not understand."
          "I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said.
          "And.." Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam T-shirt."
          I busted up, and I probably would've kept laughing all day, but then I heard a noise:
          "Moooo."
          The smile melted off my face. I wondered if the noise was just in my head, but Grover had stopped laughing too.
          He was looking around, confused. "Did I just hear a cow?"
          "A dam cow?" Thalia laughed
          "No" Grover said. "I'm serious."

I’m so excited to have my rights taken away >w< shout out trump for loving women and the lgbtq community uwu!! I love the fact I’ll never get gender affirming care it’s so coquette i love being American USAAAA