Smiley7789

Shit, the poison didn't work

The longer I live the more I resent the existence of all life.

Everyone unfortunate enough to read this, I present to you the only politician that I take seriously https://youtu.be/4d_FvgQ1csE

I'm calling it now this decade is going to suck.

A lot of edgelords will say shit like "I listen to death metal because it's gory and dark" and by death metal they usually mean they listen to deathcore and don't know the difference between the two or they just listen to cannibal corpse (don't get me wrong cannibal corpse is fucking awesome) but how about those fucking normies listen to this https://youtu.be/eAXDi35Zxz0

If a toy in Toy Story died the kids wouldn't know and the other toys would have to watch the kid play with their lifeless corpse.

This one time my grandmother said that my generation relies too much on technology. Now me being the smartass I am I called her a hypocrite and unplugged her life support.

Something I desperately hate with a passion are Instagram "comedians" the reason I put "comedians" in quotes is because a real comedian is someone who puts effort into their jokes and can come up with something clever and quippy on the fly, but these people on Instagram are typically just big tittied bimbos whose self-esteem is so low that the only way they can validate their existence is from little likes or hearts they get because of their massive tits and lack of personality.
          
          The biggest offender of this kind of shit is Lele Pons. I can sum up all her jokes in one sentence, and here it is "I'm hot and Hispanic and I make loud noises in a Mexican accent" but the thing that makes my blood boil is the fact that she has her own fucking sitcom on tv called Amigos, and if I'm being honest if you gave me the option of watching one episode of Amigos or eat a 1000-year-old, fossilized, iguana turd you might as well diagnose me with ecoli right fucking now.

One thing among many other things in life I don't understand is why the hell are there people that read self-help books? And if you're looking for self-help why would you read a book by someone else? That's not self-help, that's help! There's no such thing as self-help if you did it yourself you didn't need help. Try and pay attention to the language that we all agree on!

This is a video of an Irish funeral, but before the guy died he recorded a bunch of lines of him jokingly asking to be let out of his coffin, and they played it https://youtu.be/oEygbbZK-u0 now even I have to admit that this is pretty morbid but at the same time he left this world leaving a smile on everyone's face, and honestly that's how I want to go out.