Social_Anxiety69

this message may be offensive 
I honestly don't know why I'm writing this, I doubt anyone cares enough to read it but I guess sharing your thoughts and feelings help you feel better so, this is just a rant to myself and anyone who wants to read I guess.
          	
          	For starters life is just shitty. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out but it's true, and it sucks. I'm in high school right now and I wish I was a kid again. I'm not that old, this is my second year of high school so I'm only like 13-14, but that makes it worse. Just four years ago, what I worried most about was getting my first period as back then I was terrified of blood. Now what I hate most is going to school, forcing myself to seem all happy "like I normally am", and sometimes even going home. I never knew how much people just sucked until I went to high school. And yes I know that the're amazing people in the world and my friends are always there for me and all that but, it's just hard to believe that people genuinely care now. 
          	
          	The're so many things I want to rant about but, for now I want to get to the point of this one. My school holiday ended and I start school...well today, and I haven't slept even though it's around 2:30 am and I have to wake up at 5:30 am. I was so excited at first cause I thought 'I finally get to see my friends and play music and-' blah blah blah, but here I am right now at 2 am tired as fuck but too exhausted to sleep with a heavy feeling in the pit of my stomach and it feels like my heart is sinking and I don't know why. Then out of nowhere I started thinking about my friends and about how much they ACTUALLY care when they ask 'how are you' or if my dad ever wishes I never existed and the're tears in my eyes right now and I'm crying but no matter how hard I try it just won't stop.
          	
          	I just feel so drained right now, though I always do anyway. I should probably try sleep, can't miss school I guess. To anyone who for some reason actually read this, I hope you have a goodnight or...morning, I really do.

Social_Anxiety69

this message may be offensive 
I honestly don't know why I'm writing this, I doubt anyone cares enough to read it but I guess sharing your thoughts and feelings help you feel better so, this is just a rant to myself and anyone who wants to read I guess.
          
          For starters life is just shitty. It doesn't take a genius to figure it out but it's true, and it sucks. I'm in high school right now and I wish I was a kid again. I'm not that old, this is my second year of high school so I'm only like 13-14, but that makes it worse. Just four years ago, what I worried most about was getting my first period as back then I was terrified of blood. Now what I hate most is going to school, forcing myself to seem all happy "like I normally am", and sometimes even going home. I never knew how much people just sucked until I went to high school. And yes I know that the're amazing people in the world and my friends are always there for me and all that but, it's just hard to believe that people genuinely care now. 
          
          The're so many things I want to rant about but, for now I want to get to the point of this one. My school holiday ended and I start school...well today, and I haven't slept even though it's around 2:30 am and I have to wake up at 5:30 am. I was so excited at first cause I thought 'I finally get to see my friends and play music and-' blah blah blah, but here I am right now at 2 am tired as fuck but too exhausted to sleep with a heavy feeling in the pit of my stomach and it feels like my heart is sinking and I don't know why. Then out of nowhere I started thinking about my friends and about how much they ACTUALLY care when they ask 'how are you' or if my dad ever wishes I never existed and the're tears in my eyes right now and I'm crying but no matter how hard I try it just won't stop.
          
          I just feel so drained right now, though I always do anyway. I should probably try sleep, can't miss school I guess. To anyone who for some reason actually read this, I hope you have a goodnight or...morning, I really do.