Kureijī Uragirimono

You dont sound like Larry...

I'm back-
          I haven't been on my other accounts for a while-

I GUESS THEY NEVER MISS HUH? YOU GOT A BOYFRIEND I BET HE DOESNT KISS YA MUAH. HE GON FIND ANOTHER GIRL AND HE WONT MISS YA. THEN HE GON HIT THE DAB LIKE WIZ KALIFA

Oh god, I really haven't been on much, have I?

"You're cellphone rings, you don't recognize the number. What do you do?"
          
           "Ignore it! "
          
           "Ignore it. Send it to voice mail, yeah. But not this guy. I answer it. Yeah, exactly, opportunity, potential, who knows! Who knows what it is?! The other day I was driving down the 405, traffic. Phone rings '917' New York. I'm like, "oouh, I don't know the number. I hit talk, the other guy on the line goes..."

"Ya'know, this doesn't sound like Larry.."
          
          then the random guy chimes in and he's like:
          
          "sOUNDS LIKE BRUCE—"

My followers skyrocket on 2 of my accounts when I start feeling depressed. Like, wtf?!

I want to die, right now

Holy shit, I was gone for a day, and now I have 204 followers! 

Who else began to hate, ugh, Rapunzel(ew) after watching "Tangled the Series"?