For the past few days, I have been going through a slump.
I have an idea of where it comes from. It comes from school, the loss of long friendships, the inability to express myself properly.
I push people away.
I don't mean to. I just don't know how to NOT push others away from the fire. I don't know how to keep people from leaving. Misery loves company.
I also have difficulty expressing these feelings. I know that if i try and complain, it would be ignored and would cause me to feel worse than previously.
I don't know if i want to go and live my life in nature or die. i dont want to die. but dying would feel better than what i am feeling currently. I am not suicidal. I don't like pain. I don't like anything.
i barely like myself.
