stylinson's youngest family member♡

Are you ok?

This one is the last post:
          
          30 minutes later. I'm still there. But now he's come in my room turns the lights back on, sat down on my bed... "*exchange student name, *my sisters name, and I all have covid". Amazing. He leaves, door open, lights on. I turn everything off, close the door again, take 15 minutes and go take a shower in the dark and cry. After my shower I do a couple stretches to see if it'll help my back pain but it didn't. Get called down for dinner. Put my hand over my eyes to try and block the light in the kitchen and my dad looks at them and asks me what drugs I took. I told him I havent taken any drugs but he doesnt believe me. I think he's going to get me drug tested. I didnt have an appetite but since I took pills I had to eat something. Forced some food down. Got yelled at cause I was almost crying at the table. Had to run to the bathroom to puke. Great. No more food, no more pills. Gotta love being forced to have a migrane. My dad barged into the br when I was done puking just sitting on the floor trying to catch my breath and he tells me I dont need to be so depressed ab it. I try to tell him that its the bright lights and the loud noise and the being forced to eat when I dont have an appetite that made me puke. Which it was. But he didn't listen. Forced me to eat ice cream cause "it'll make you feel better". It didn't. I puked. Again. Oh well. Fast forward to today. Guess who now has covid 
          
          Istg

Not the last post...:
          
          I go upstairs to start crying again. And my sister barges in the room with my mom on the phone. My mom asks me whats going on and I tell her everything and what happened with dad. (My mom is in Italy visiting her family for the break). She gives me a better talk than the one my dad gave me. Told me to take a shower, make my bed, pick the clothes up from the floor, open my curtains, close my drawers, and to eat something. She knows me so well. Wtf. But then she tries cheering me up with a couple light jokes. I laugh a little and eventually we hang up. I stay on my bed not moving from there cause ive got a migrane now. But now my dad comes upstairs and yells at me like 2 hrs later. Turned the lights on at the brightest mode, hurting my eyes cause of my migrane, and starts yelling, hurting my ears cause of the migrane. I dont move. He told me if I have to stay up here then leave the lights on and clean my "pigstye" of a room. Ha okay. He leaves. I turn off the light again and stay on my bed. Uncomfortable cause now ive also got lower back pain from all my stress, which happens a lot when I've got migranes. I turn on a timer for like half an hr and try to take a nap. See if that'll make me feel better. It didn't,  my migrane got worse. Guess who comes back upstairs. My dad. He bursts through the door, turns the light back on again, tells me to stop being a depressed bitch and to get out of my room. Leaves with the light on and my door open. 
          
          Istg this thing where you have to have a certain number of characters in a post. I think the next one is going to be the last one

Actually second to last post:
          
          Didn't fall asleep til 6:30 in the morning. Great. Woke up to my dad yelling at me to wake my ass up cause it's 1:15 in the afternoon and sew that im already crying. Okay. I get up and check my phone to see if my now ex has texted me, and got introuble for using my phone cause apparently im "always on that goddamned phone". Ha. Okay. I go back upstairs to cry again. Get yelled at for that. Come down and my dad makes me do something for school. That's the last thing I want to do rn but whatever. So im doing this thing and im on the verge of tears but don't cry cause my dad's next to me. And whenever I cry I get yelled at cause I "cry way to fkn much". I get done with this thing and try to leave but my dad sees how im on the verge of tears and forces me to tell him what happened. I told him and he gave a little talk "he doesn't deserve you", "you're too good for him" yada yada. Stuff you say to someone who just got broken up with. But then he turns this into some kind of lecture ab me not being independent. I just kind of start ignoring the convo at this point cause I know where it's going, cause I always get this lecture. But then he has the audacity to start targeting my friends- .. "you need new friends" "the ones you have aren't normal" "find normal people to be around" "they've all got some kind of problem and are very dramatic" then he gets way to personal ab it. And starts talking ab my best friend and how she's dramatic for trying to kill herself with drugs and everything. Told me to stop helping her with her hw and trying to get her caught up but instead give her a reality check and tell her she "fked up her life" I wanted to punch him. Then the convo turns back to my break up and in the middle of it, he gets a phone call and leaves-.. lovely. 
          
          One more post, this time for real:

Going on with the last post:
          
          Fast forward 
          
          The 25th; my sister, exchange student brother, dad, and I go to my older sister's and her bf house for Christmas dinner. Except we have to leave early cause my dad doesn't feel well and is shivering like crazy. He couldn't even drive, so I had to drive home while he, my sister, and exchange student brother fall asleep. Cause it wasn't just my dad who didn't feel well. Ive got my permit and am the only one who can drive atm. Oh well, not terrible. I drive us home and get my dad into bed. He was feeling way worse than the others, and I had to go in a couple of times throughout the night to make sure this mask he sleeps with to keep him breathing doesn't fall off. So I obviously got no sleep. But it was fine cause I was texting the guy I was on a break with. We're flirting and everything. Suddenly it turns to be 4 in the morning of the 26th. We're both a little tired. More him than me cause ive got insomnia. I had the idiotic urge to ask him if we were gonna get back together. Long story short, he said he should never had kissed me (even though he did it twice), said it just felt right at the moment, and said he thinks we're better off "Flirting and just having fun" cause dating is "kinda mid". Wtf. So I got broken up with and in the middle of this convo he just left and told me he can't write anymore cause he's really tired. Yeah, okay. 
          
          One more post left, hang on.

So let's recap as to why my life is shit rn. 
          
          On the 24 of Nov. My bf and I went on a break so he can focus on school a little more and get his grades up. Up until the 10th of Dec everything has been fine, I make him jealous on purpose and he gets me back. Whatever. The 11th, my birthday. No text from him telling me happy birthday. Whatever. Then comes the week of the 13, we start getting wayyy closer. Like I mean him sleeping on me on the bus to one of our academy classes. Friday the 17th. HE FKN KISSES ME. Everything's going good, I think we're gonna get back together. Welp. I ask him if he wants to help me use up this gift card I got for my birthday. Lunch date. Except I didnt specify that. He said yes and we were gonna go the 27th.
          
          This is going to take a couple posts to tell the entire story

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOUUU
          
          
          I ALMOST FORGOT TO POST THAT HERE

WINTER BREAKKKKKKK

Pst besties.. its my birthday today :))
          
          Also:
          
          I'M BACK BABYYYY
          
          Imma be ranting a lot on here now. So much tea to spill. But thats for later.
          
          Ciao besties ♡
          
          Love you all <33
          
          Kisses for everyone♡

TO THE INACTIVE ASS, HELLOOOOO!!! dk if you're gonna see this but hopefully you will. how have you been??? drinking lots of water??? sleeping well??? just wanted to check on you and remind you that i'm always here you whenever you needa talk to someone about anything. and another reminder of how HAPPY I AM YOU MET YOUR GF FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY COMMENT SECTION AHHHHHHHHH?@#$%!<">#$%!">@#$%!</a> anyways i hope you have a good day/ night and take care of yourself, je t'aime, te amo, byeeeeeee <3333