Here 4 ur SoUL

I keep finding such interesting stories and ideas on wattpad. But everything is written in first person and it's so gross :( 
          It's so hard to read plus awful grammar
          Just write in 3rd person please :''(

Plague doctor: UwU what's this? A paper cut? GUESS YOU'LL HAVE TO LOSE THE HAND *yanks out saw* This'll only hurt a little
          
          Idk why or where this came from, but it's been playing in my head for last 4 hours

My cat is a bastard, he meowed at me, loudly, first thing in the morning. Not unusual, it's breakfast time! I go to feed him, he takes one tiny bite and keeps meowing. Take him back in. Nope! Hold him, calms down, but is not content, wiggles out of my arms. Follows Me to my room for daily treat. Still not what he wanted but eats it. I follow him back out. Watch him circle in front of the bathroom door, walk in and then back out. So I follow him inside, he just wanted me to watch him drink toilet water

Lemons are fruits. But it's morally wrong to put them on a fruit salad

I recently realized that if it exists then there is a kink of it
          Exhibit A: Hair fetish
          Exhibit B: Eyeball fetish
          Exhibit C: Actirasty the arousal by the Suns rays

Jazz was meowing at me so sad. Tried to show him his food, let him out. Turned out all he wanted was cuddles

Some reason I have a thing in my head now 
          Person A: Would you fuck me for 1000 bucks? 
          Person B:I'd do it for 10
          Person A: Oh? So do you lik-
          Person B: You're a cheap whore

List of things I've said today-
          -*while sipping a way to sweet coffee at 5 this morning to the sound of crickets and regretting life decisions* But what if bananas had faces?
          -I've reached new levels of tired
          -My eye bags be fucking Gucci whatchu tryna say? (I got told I look like I haven't slept in weeks) 
          -I've reached my max of "I give a shit" For the day try again later
          -No. Just. No. 
          -Oh sweet BAby JeSUs-----
          -Sup bitch ass
          -You look like a sewer rat try again
          -Quinn.exe Has stopped working please try again later
          -I'm a flaming pile of garbage gay
          -Okah but, thighs. 
          -I'm a bi disaster hun pleaSe put thag shirt down
          -Not to be horny on main but-
          -Someone put "The greatest disaster to ever gay" In my obituary
          -You ever just. Forget how. Word? 
          -I wanna trade my tits for a dick

So. In history we watched a video. And k learned about Viking funeral. Well. When the leader dies he is burned with one of his slave girls. But um. She dies by being stabbed and choked. It was described however as the blade thrust between her ribs as she was throttled by two men and. My instant thought was "Heh, kinky"

Can Aizawa use Erasure on Dark Shadow? And if so, is that murder? Or at least, temporary murder???