If you ever find this:
It has been years since we last spoke, and for a good reason probably. If you feel like this is something that you would rather keep in the past, feel free to ignore my message. I am not sure if I can call myself your friend anymore after what I did, so I won't say anything that could upset you. In case you decide to read this, I would like to thank you. First, I would like to say that the time I spent with you as a friend was incredibly fun. With you, I felt like I could keep pushing through all of the hardships that kept crashing into me. Our conversations may not always have been happy, most of them were quite depressing actually. But the time we spent talking and playing games together has been, and still is, a big part of my brightest and most beloved memories.
Secondly, I am extremely sorry for pushing my feelings onto you when you were at your worst. It was honestly the worst moment I could have picked. Instead of being selfish, I should have comforted you and tried to be there. I'm sorry if my feelings were something you felt like you had to accept, especially because of how you must have been feeling at the time. If I had been in your position I would probably have done the same. I thought that everything would be okay if you and I were together (platonically), but I was wrong. We were two scarred people who were trying to fix one another with our own broken pieces.
I have thought a lot about you over the years, how we met, what we talked about and how it ended. I feel very apologetic to you for how I handled things, I was very childish. I am sure that I did a lot of shameful things as well, even if I can't remember them. However, I hope that I was able to bring you some happy or comforting moments, like you did for me. I tried to be helpful and kind to you, to be there when you needed me- but it wasn't enough. If I could go back to that time, I would have tried harder to be a good friend. I'm sorry I was unable to be one.
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