I'm actually here but it's only to give my status then leave, still got a lot to do. And you all think I'm me, the fire in my eyes/different/random/old childish/oblivious self. And I've just dropped hints, but have different sides that people just shrug off, the real me is just a base or foundation. I kill in another way. The way the most of you hold dearest. the real me just suits this. It gives me the mind numbing oblivion to avoid guilt and I can change to get close to someone. Someone gives me a target. I get close to the easier end, then slowly wear away at the relationship, planting seeds of doubt then it all explodes. Then I slip away, like nothing happened. They drift away from me in the stupor and my job is done. I also love music. I have no talent in it. So I just follow the beat, I hold up myself with the same thing that keeps me alive. I go by so many people that you have no idea about, some of which I've hinted to in past conversations and you've met and brushed it off. That's how much I can change. By now your face has either morphed into horror, your oblivious and don't care, or you feel void. Because I see lives and personalities as music, a beat to fix and change. I just alter it. I can twist the strings that make you you to like/hate/change me or by my hand. It's a curse and a gift. So I'll follow my beat. You all have a beat of your own. You could deny it or be depressed over it. But that beat can be the only thing you have, unless you throw it into the dark void that is death. The darkness that claws into your eyes into your mind until it's all you know.