Hello, I'm a Space Lord from the planet Galliway.  I'm 835 years old and am fascinated by the human race.

I travel in a spaceship that can travel through space (and time, but mostly space) and has the very good disguise of a portable toilet (more commonly known by the distasteful name of "port-o-potty").  

My spaceship is called the FarDis.  FarDis stands for several things, the two main ones being Far Distances In Space (or just Far Distances) and Farts And Relative Dimensions In Space.  The second name is not a name I decided (or wanted) for it, that was the doing of one of my companions.  

The very special thing about the FarDis is that it is bigger on the inside.  

I'm not going to explain anymore than that about the inside of the FarDis because I really couldn't.  You see, I have no idea what it looks like right now.  The FarDis is in disrepair and I can't get inside without the key (which I lost due to a recent battle with my enemy, the Therapist).  

I've been trying to fix it but it's taking a lot longer than I expected.  My companion, and friend, has decided to take the extra time this temporary inconvenience has granted us to write about our adventures.

-The Professor

P.S
I have learned certain things over the years and one very important thing for you to know is that I am not from the universe of Time Lords.  Basically, Space Lords are the Time Lords of a parallel universe.