John Parker.
Yeah that's me, Peters brother.
Yknow Spider-Man? Yeah that's me too. 
I've got the skills and all that stuff. 

Got tones of awesome people in my life.
Bree, Haiz, Amber, y'all know who you are. 

Oh yeah, note to Peters kids, I'll say this as calm as possible. 

DO NOT CALL ME 'UNCLE' John FOR PETES SAKE I AM NOT THAT OLD.
UNCLE MAKES ME SOUND LIKE IM 60! I AM NOT A MONKEYS UNCLE EITHER DONT EVEN GO THERE, PLEASE. 

*mutters* Peter needs to control his kids.

If you are the Gwen that I know. Korean Meatball Gwen. 

Hope.
Hold
On
Pain
Ends



And for those who mess with my friends

It may be the worst decision you make. 
You can mess with me, bully me, hell, go ahead and try to hack me [No, please don't]


BUT FOR PETES SAKE LEAVE MY FRIENDS ALONE