UltimateKaaji

Your book is great!
           Here's some tips on how to get better.
          
          
          If your writing a description, don't put the man said.
          
          Just make a mystery and then write as if there  doing nothing.
          
          Also when writing a story, keep your paragraphs spaced out like I have right here so your reader have a easy time reading.
          
          Hopes this helps you

TinkerGrady

It most definitely did help me!
            
            I have tried to keep it spaced out throughout the story, but I realize and welcome the thought and challenge that I'm not perfect.
            
            
            Thanks so much for the advice and I'm looking forward to updating the story to make it close to my high expectations!
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