Welcome one and all, to the only person stupid enough to use a real name (I know clever me). I write, but most of my work is currently in draft form. Unfortunately you can't read it, but it lets me decide on a solid plot if I write multiple chapters before publishing. 

There are definitely better writers on this site, but then again, there are worse too. See, I'm at least half modest!

Here's some stuff to keep you entertained while I probably am not writing (none of these these are mine. You can tell, because they a mildly humorous):


•The police are looking for someone funny, good looking and intelligent. You're safe, but what am I gonna do?

•Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana. 

•When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my granddad , not yelling and screaming like the people in his car. 

•Join the dark side: we have cookies, pop-tarts and fancy dress parties.i

•Imma gonna take a potato chip... AND EAT IT!