Puppet Master

would you like a Fact?

i. just mixed up cindy lou who and lin manuel miranda again

theoretically i could have timetravelled and mass murdered a crowd of Victorians by blasting WAP on full volume and just forgotten about it. it’s not like any witnesses were left alive

when i was coming home a few minutes ago the car stopped for a moment and i saw the car behind had a toy rabbit at the wheel.
          
          it was pink and about the size of a toddler. i only saw the person holding it up to the wheel for a moment but they had an expression of Absolute Glee on their face. when the cars started moving again they kept on using the rabbit to drive and i only regret that i was too mesmerised to take a picture

i just came back from an eye appointment. my legacy as the last remaining family member who doesn’t currently need glasses has been ruined
          
          it turns out i have astigmatisms

I’ve had the phrase “grandmothers are small to be easily throwable” written on my hand for the past three days

there’s scaffolding outside my window and i quite like it because it distracts from the fact that everything beyond that is completely stark white

if i ever get one of those watches that knows your heartbeat it’s going to shut down entirely after about three days because it will not be able to comprehend the speed my heart goes at constantly even when im lying down and will think im trying to sprint upwards into space

Ten Days Until The Horse Leaves The Hospital

i just saw the ao3 tag “carrot stick misuse” and it holds mysterious unplumbed possibilities that im not quite sure my brain can handle