Lilly Blue

My house has been burnt down for almost 3 months now and I'm now living with my uncle which honestly sucks ass and I don't know what to do, I'm so ready to give up 

I am so done with this and we haven't even been here for 30 hours
          
          I wish my mom will just take the offer of staying at a hotel

This is so fucked up
          
          Last year my whole family had to leave our house so it can be redone and when they finished they wouldn't let us move back in, and now it got brunt down, it happened over 4 hours ago now I have no clue what is going to happen 

Virgin like condition 

Some days I just want to stop talking to everyone and just go off the grid 

I think it's time to stop talking to my mom and dad soon

Oh great they fought again
          What am I gonna do, I hope they stop with the drugs with the fighting with the cheating with everything, I just want to be clean so I can leave next year without having to be scared for the kids

We're having a big party for my birthday but I would have just been happy getting a switch, but no one asked me what I wanted they just don't care, I want to leave this house but I can't no one would take me in, well someone would but they're up north.
          
          Why can't I just stop my emotions, I don't want them anymore 

My family treats me so unfair
          My sister got a vr headset in April and I got my phone in the beginning of June and I've been asking for a phone for over two years, I wanted a switch for Christmas I didn't get one while my brother got alot of stuff more then 13 stuff while I got 4 things which broke within 2 weeks, I keep the house clean and they don't care and get mad at me when I don't do stuff like I haven't raised my two baby brothers, I stopped asking for stuff cuz my mom says no everytime but if my sister asks she says yeah.
          
          I'm so done with them

I'm crying on my birthday,, I wish my grandpa's we're here I miss them,,, I want to run away to my grandpa house one last time
          
          I want to learn stuff from him again
          I want to fishing with them
          I just want them here