Hey everyone out there.
I have been struggling with some issues lately, and I kept it inside for too long. I have a friend group. I was in this friend group since I was 4 or 5. We were inseparable. Now two sisters join this group, and start spreading rumors about me. For example, I am a straight a student. Those two sisters started telling the others I was cheating, I was a liar, making fun of my weight (I am borderline between normal and overweight), all behind my back. They made fun of me saying I was ugly annoying, a pick me, and so much more. They would never be happy for me or let me be happy, saying I was bragging, and if I made a mistake, I was the worst person in the world. I didn’t have that many friends besides them, so I thought this was normal. Eventually it got so bad that it was easier talking to a stranger than talking . Recently, I went on a trip outside the country, where my grandparents and cousins were for a little over a month. I made some friends over there. They were probably the best people I ever met. They included me in everything and let me actually have a say in things. I was almost reduced to tears this one time when I mumbled something to add to their conversation, the friends I made there looked at me and actually cared on what I was saying. This was the turning point.
When I got back home, however, I was in tears, leaving the people that actually cared about me behind. The friends I had at home made a group without me and told me in front of my face while we were over at someone’s house. I don’t now if you guys have felt it before, but there’s this feeling of loneliness that you have, like no one cares for you anymore. It felt like I was alone, no one to have my back anymore. During this, I was dealing with severe depression, and all the confidence I had in myself was gone. I am slowly getting better, even if it is still hard to get up everyday wearing a fake smile.
Thank you so much for reading this through I really love you guys.