VapmiresDontSparkle
this message may be offensive
TW//VENT
Lol my gf called me annoying my dysphoria is getting worse my self esteem has killed itself and Im tempted to do the same. Its literally fucking 1:30 in the goddamn morning. I wish my gf was here tho, even if she did call me annoying. I haven't seen her in a week. I wish so desperately to not have this fucking female body, its not right its not me, I dont belong in here. Why did I have to be cursed with it? Just, why? Why do I have to deal with so much shit at such an early age? Hell my mother doesn't make things better, the homophobic, transphobic, mentally abusive, neglectful bitch! I went almost two years without seeing her because she always values her boyfriends more than me, and now my little sister as well! We go weeks without seeing her now. She never even tries to reach out to me. Never texts, never asks my aunt or nana how me and my sis are doing, no! She's busy spending time with her stalker sex offender boyfriend and her bratty asshole of a step son instead of her own kids who actually need her for once! Ive been trying to hold back my emotions, but Im honestly about to break. I mean, when am I not? Fuck Ive been messed up since age four! Started being suicidal at age five, blamed myself for making everyone's problems worse! I fucking hate her so damn much, not just my mother, but this GIRL I'm "supposed" to be. I hurt everyone, I annoy everyone. Why can't I just be a normal, happy BOY for once? People hate me for being me! I just want all of this to end....