VodkaCrayonberry

HI

SO YESTERDAY THEY PLAYED NEVER ENDING SONG IN WALMART BUT I'D FORGOTTEN THE DANCE AND MOST OF THE LYRICS *wails* BUT I ACTED ABSOLUTELY INSANE FOR THE NEXT HOUR AND THEN I WAS SO TIRED I HAD TO TAKE A NAP T-T

tHe OnLy ThInG tHaT kEePs Me FrOm DrIvInG tHiS cAr
          HaLf LiGhT, jAcK kNiFe InTo ThE cAnYoN aT nIgHt 
          SiGnS aNd WoNdErS, pErSeUs AlIgNeD wItH tHe SkUlL
          sLaIn MeDuSa, PeGaSuS aLiGhT fRoM uS aLl
          
          Do I cArE iF i SuRvIvE tHiS, bUrY tHe DeAd WhErE tHeY'rE fOuNd
          iN a VeIl Of GrEaT sUrPrIsEs, I wOnDeR dId YoU lOvE mE aT aLl
          

I want to just close my eyes and pretend I'm 9 years old and am wearing a sparkly Justice shirt and watching Littlest Pet Shop and sticking pretzels in my PB&J sandwich to pretend they're birthday candles...
          
          Oh and pretend that my mom didn't tell me I deserved a millstone around my neck when I was 9. That always spoils the mood. 

Random: as a child, I developed an inexplicable hatred of the word "brat". I think it may be because when I was like 9 my older sister said it about our cousin. When I was like 11 this got way worse because she said the WellieWishers (I bet 90% of y'all have no idea who they are) were brats, and that was my favorite show! Yes I was watching shows for preschoolers at age 11. And I never stopped. Then when she said a different cousin was a brat, that was the final straw! Because that was my FAVORITE COUSIN!!! (Okay, probably more like second favorite. I had another cousin who i decided was my BFF.) My 12th and 13th years were filled with me running around screaming at anyone who even said the word, insisting it was actually a bad word. After all, it IS a four letter word. "Brat" meant cancellation. We weren't allowed to watch Eloise or Super Why (two more of my favorite shows as a preteen) because my older sister said they were brats. One time my mom was telling our grandma on the phone that the youngest had a new friend who lived across the street, and my older sister shouted into the phone, "SHE'S A BRAT!!!" She was 21 and I remember thinking, wow, not mature. If there's one thing my 13-year-old self would be proud of, it's the fact that now I'm 21 and I'm not like that at all. Unfortunately this irrational hatred of the word never really went away and like a year ago I decided I'd become president someday and ban the word "brat" from the ENTIRE COUNTRY!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!! Oh, not only that, but I'd declassify "fuck" as a bad word. I think it's really just because when parents say their kids are brats, then they often HIT THEM!!!! ESPECIALLY IF THEY'RE NEURODIVERGENT!!!!!! I've calmed down now, and I don't really plan on running for president, but I will never, ever like that word. End of story.

STUPID SONG IS IN THE HEARTSTOPPER FOREVER TRAILER

Hey thanks for following! May I ask why?

Okay, so Wattpad removed my last announcement and I can't reply to your comments. But I'm okay *crosses fingers behind back*, I just am very confused about life right now. Not surprisingly, I got my period two days after that announcement. I'm like 99.9999999% sure I have PMDD.

Did I ever tell y'all that a year and a half ago, my family went to a free concert of Handel's Messiah (that wasn't very good) and when I got home I was so frustrated that I listened to Dixon Dallas? 

Sometimes I worry that I'm secretly straight and neurotypical, but all I have to do is spend about 5 seconds inside my head and my imposter syndrome shuts riiiiiight up.