WarriorLionstripe

I’m going on hiatus. Initially, I was still uncertain about it, but some information from a close Wattpad friend today has come out about a person who I made the mistake of providing an olive branch to. I’m feeling all sorts of betrayal from the person I gave that second chance to and angry at myself knowing that giving that olive branch likely was what gave the individual an opportunity to hurt my friend. 
          
          I don’t trust myself anymore, and that incident has solidified that. All I do is inadvertently hurt the people closest to me, so I believe it is for the better that I don’t interact with anyone else for a while. I’m truly sorry to anyone who has ever been hurt because of my stupid actions, indirectly or directly. None of you deserved it. You deserve better than that, and you deserve a better friend. 

I must admit that I miss what things used to be like here. I miss my friends. I miss making connections without the worry that they will fizzle out. I miss the feeling of happiness I would get when writing and getting ecstatic when people would acknowledge that writing. And it’s weird. Those early years on this app were some of the most stressful yet nostalgic moments of my life. 
          
          But to cut things to the chase: I’m questioning my place on Wattpad again. It feels like every part of my life has been built on silence, like this all-consuming, ever-present manifestation that never ceases to leave me alone. Countless people have went dark over the years due to various circumstances, and I’ve…not really recovered from that. Some of the people I was closest to would disappear from my life without another trace. Flicker deleted their account out of nowhere. Levi disappeared. Blaze is busy with uni. Kitty disappeared. Goop disappeared. Flamingstar disappeared. Firestar disappeared. Mr-President stopped talking to me like two years ago. I also haven’t heard from Autumn for a little over two years. Scruffy and Stick also went dark on me. Chomp went dark on me. I don’t have many people left here, and my stories are all pretty much dead. No-one really cares about the announcements that I do make about my stories either outside of two people who message occasionally. I’m also inactive as all hell most days. So, I really don’t see much of a reason to stay here. 

Happy Halloween to those who celebrate. ^^

Also, I sometimes wonder how the Warriors Wiki has managed to structure their Allegiances pages the way they do. I'm trying to piece together an Allegiances page for Rising Storm, and it is not going to plan because it just looks weird and stiff when I do it with just text. What type of template do they use to set up the individual Clan allegiances?

This is a random-ass question before I work on my chemistry II lab worksheet: 
          
          What has been your favourite story of mine? It could even be old stories that no longer exist or have been discontinued / retconned.
          
          (Still disappointed in myself that the only two books I ever completed were Chronicles of the Prophecies: A Prophecy of Four and Chaos Sagas: The Soothing Storm, both of whom got rebooted, lol.)

I will be henceforth blocking anyone that asks for a followback. I do not currently do follow-for-follow and haven’t done so in roughly three years. I don’t mind if someone asks if I do follow-for-follow, in which I will answer no, but I will not be doing follow-for-follow. I will personally decide to followback, and it will not be a guarantee as I have become picky with who I am following. 
          
          That is all. 

It still feels strange and uncomfortable when my more personal posts get more attention than my story-related posts. I do understand that it is due in part to my inactivity, so my story-related posts aren’t getting seen at the same rate that they used to, but it still feels uncomfortable that my personal posts get the most attention. 
          
          But it’s also a me-thing too. I don’t particularly like feeling vulnerable. I don’t like admitting that I am struggling mentally and subsequently causing people to worry about me. So the times I do let myself be vulnerable when I reach a particular tipping point, they are almost always receiving a bit more attention than my other posts maybe because I am not emotionally open enough with people, so it feels like it becomes this “Lion dropped new lore about himself” type of thing, but even that feels unnerving. It feels less like people honestly caring and more like people want to witness some kind of spectacle. Because my story-related posts get sidelined often, but my personal posts get more attention than I am really comfortable with. 
          
          I’m not asking people to be more talkative, though. I’m okay with the select few people who have maintained contact with me. I just ask that people be more mindful of how they are interacting with others. If you ever see a personal post of mine that catches your eye, perhaps check some of my story-related posts too to help balance things out. It would mean a lot. Thanks to anyone who happens to have seen this in their notifications for their time. ^^

When adding together the (as of currently) finalised allegiances for the Western Coalition (Territory of the Roots + Territory of the Moor Cats) and the Lakeshore Alliance (Empire of the Rippling Lake Territory + Territory of Dusk Hollow), you get surprising numbers. The Western Coalition have 125 cats in total, while the Lakeshore Alliance has 92 cats in total. When I add the fact that the Birch Federation's new population count will be 134 cats, you can easily understand why the Lakeshore Alliance shits itself at the idea of the Birch Federation joining the Western Coalition's side of the Lakefront War. But I might have to up the population for the Rippling Lake at some point anyway, so perhaps the Lakeshore Alliance will have a larger total population in the future.

Just your friendly reminder that Rising Storm is 100% going to be darker than the original version. 
          
          Originally, I avoided leaning too much into the mental health aspect of the story to avoid discussing things I didn’t understand much about or had experienced as I was only dealing with occasional-to-monthly depressive episodes around that point in time. It honestly made the story feel more cheesy and a mockery to the few times those topics were discussed than anything else, and I’m finally ready to let loose with the darker tone. It’s time for Rising Storm’s central theme of mental health to shine through. 
          
          I also understand if you have concerns about the material I will be addressing in Rising Storm. As I always recommend, if you believe that the material in Rising Storm will be triggering for you, please do not read it. I prefer writing darker stories that address real world problems to some capacity, but I also do not wish for people to be negatively impacted by any of those stories by reading something triggering to them. I’d rather have lower-than-anticipated views than have hurt readers who are reeling from reading something that reminds them of a traumatic experience. 

Hey, mates. I just want to give a formal update on things going on in my life right now. Hopefully clear the air and explain why I’m absent so often and why that will continue to be the case.
          
          - I’ve been dealing with juggling a bunch of big assignments for my classes, namely my statistics and chemistry classes. 
          
          - I now have a job working at one of my university’s dining halls, so I will be spending quite some time filling in hours at those positions on Sunday, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. 
          
          - None of my mental issues have really cleared up as I had hoped they would, and I’ve been in a perpetual state of lowness or outright depression for roughly two years now. It has killed a lot of my motivation, so it’s been getting harder to write like I used to. I’m still hoping to stick by some kind of schedule, though, and I do want to at least release Rising Storm’s Prologue by December. 
          
          - With everything going on right now, I’m not sure I will be very interactive here going forward. I still hope to talk to people every now and again, and I would not mind if people send anything on my message board at all, but it might take me awhile to reply or just generally talk. 
          
          Thank you all for a wonderful six years on Wattpad. I’ve made countless mistakes, but you all helped me learn how to be both a better writer and a better person. Perhaps I would have always turned out the way I am now, but you all helped guide me in the right direction nonetheless. This isn’t some goodbye thing, but I want to take the time to offer a wholehearted expression of gratitude for everything. Without any of you, there wouldn’t be a Lakefront Sagas or Chronicles of Pandemonium, and I always be grateful for the now over six years of support and friendships many of you have provided.