Willow595130
this message may be offensive
This is a rant!
You don't have to read it if you don't want to.
It might also be triggering for some people.
I fucking hate myself,I hate the way I look, talk, my personality, my humor. I don't normally do this but I can't talk to any of my friends because they just re-assure me I'm pretty, I have talked to my girlfriend about it and she says the same thing. I just feel so worthless, I don't know what to do with myself. It always feels like I'm being so lazy and then push myself to do something and then I repeat. I also hate the fact I can't sleep without having to worry about packing up in the middle of the night, I think the sleep that I got at my friend's house was the most sleep I've had for like a week and a half. I promised my friend I would make it to the ninth grade and I don't really want to, I don't have a reason to stay. I miss my mom, I honestly kinda wish my mom was the one that survived. It would still hurt me to lose my dad but he's so much meaner than my mom was. All he does is yell at me for whatever reason he chooses, I could be sitting in my room and fall asleep after school and he'll yell at me for sleeping and then make me do chores. I don't know what to do anymore, about anything, it feels like my friendships are falling apart. It feels like my relationship is falling apart, we've been together for 11 months so far and those have been the best months ever but I thought she was about to break up with me today.
Sorry if you did read this
I really just needed to write somewhere and my dad goes through all my notes
calixxxx_20
this message may be
offensive
@Willow595130 I love you so so much baby. I'm so sorry. I was being a complete dumbass yesterday I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm never leaving you I promise. Forever and always remember? I love you so so much I'm sorry. We can move out soon and you will never have to deal with your dad or his shit ever again i promise. I wish we never moved apart. I wish your mom was the one who survived. I wish things were better for you. I'm working my ass off to get money to come see you. I'm getting closer everyday. Please hold on I know it's hard. I'm so sorry baby. Sweet dreams
