With3red_L1ly

Why do i always get the urge to harm myself every time i cry, it's honestly so confusing

With3red_L1ly

I hate going to bible study every fuckin Saturday night and i hate how im obligated to go every single time
          
          I hate how I'm not allowed to miss SINGLE day. What? Just because i need to "socialize" with the other kids??? I dont even socialize in general! 
          
          I hate it
          I hate this family and its stupid rules
          I hate how im forced to act like i believe in a god i don't think is real
          I hate this
          I hate this house
          I hate church
          I hate my family
          I hate god
          I hate everything in general
          
          I hate hatehatehatehate my life

With3red_L1ly

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I hate living with my paternal grandmother so fucking much like she's so ANNOYINGGGGGG
          
          Like just now i told her i didn't want a hug (bc she usually hugs me whenever she sends me off yo bed all night) and she proceeds go start BITCHING about how thats not normal bc i made up some stupid excuse that i was cold and shit just for her not to hug me and UGHheushsjx
          
          It's not that i dont like physical touch i just dont like it from HER
          
          Her hugs are overbearing and i feel icky when she hugs me tight
          
          She never gets the FUCKING HINT! Whenever i hug her i dont do it fully like i don't fully wrap my arms around her just like up to my elbows but OMGGGGGG
          
          SHE SHOULD'VE SEEN BY NOW HOW UNCOMFORTABLE I WAS WITH PHYSICAL TOUCH BUT NOOOOOO SHE'S A FUCKING BITCH CUNT WHORE WHO CAN'T TAKE A FUCKING HINT GOODNESS I FUCKING HATE HER SO MUCCCH

With3red_L1ly

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"The test was difficult because you didn't study" 
          
          I DID STUDY??????? 
          
          So apparently i can't find a test significantly hard if i study now?! What kind of FUCKING BULLSHIT IS THAT?! 
          
          You can still study for a test and find it very difficult, there's absolutely NO logic for you to not do so???? 
          
          GOD I FUCKING HATE LIVING HERE

With3red_L1ly

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I can't even study properly because of the pain and because this useless fucking household always nagging me doesn't help at all 
          
          Goddamnit i am so irritable but i can't even express it otherwise I'll get scolded and get a 1 hour talk about how i have to "respect your elders" type bullshit like that

Wh1T3lIlyC00k13

@With3red_L1ly IKR? Literally I am so irritated by my household rules and my parents being too much and the fact that they don't understand my feelings at all, l I ke if I try to explain it they would never ever get it. Also if I get in trouble without even trying to be rude I can't say anything or like how you said I would get scolded or have some long talk about some how I did wrong. Sometimes I feel like my mother is emotionally abusing me but I don't know.
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