Hello! I’m the person from reddit that’s feed-backing on wattpad stories.
Your first two chapters dedicated to Laia and Aspen aren’t necessary, especially for Aspen. The information about Aspen (him being handsome, being her neighbour, moody etc) is mundane enough to be brought up in conversation (which you have) or thoughts instead of having a whole chapter. Same thing for Laia, it can be incorporated into the story. You can show us how she’s independent, her teddy and her friend. Giving too much right away in one go can be overwhelming at times.
Writing wise, it’s descriptive and enticing. You nailed the basics of writing. I’m excited for the whole ‘boy next door’ trope that you’ve started.
Everything else is lovely so far, though I can’t fully critique the characters because there’s only 3 chapters haha. I’ll keep and eye out for any future chapters you’ll put out.
Pat on the back for you!
-Saint
