*IF YOU HAVE PRECIOUS, LADY LIKE EARS, STOP READING THIS. IN FACT, DON'T READ ANY OF MY BOOKS. JUST LEAVE RIGHT NOW*

Let's start off simple. My name is Emily, and I love reading, writing, drawing, creativity in all forms. I have many weird "quirks", but I'll only tell you a few. If I get a bottle of Coca-Cola, nobody needs to worry about me getting cavities because I'll only drink down to like, the top of the label, then I'll put it in the back of the fridge and forget about it. So, we have to clean out the top shelf of the fridge pretty often.  I am a die hard animal lover, and I love children. I'm very intelligent, but I have a very strong personality. I'm stubborn and sarcastic, which means I can definitely be a handful. But hey, that's what you got two hands for, right? I tend to be abrasive, and I've been told many times that I'm too brutally honest and critical. I've had a great home life, and I have two loving mothers (yes, they're gay, so if you're homophobic, just stop reading right f*cking now) and an amazing father. I have three dogs and three cats. Well, I'm running out of characters, so BYE B*TCHES! Read my books. You'll find that you love me VERY soon! MWAH!