Grey Bartolo

You know that wedding story I keep on posting about? Well now it has a magical society, magical crime underworld, and queer people not knowing how to flirt or break up normally. 
          
          No Beatriz, robbing your one night stand is not how you get them to date you long term wtf

More snippets cause suddenly my quote people have lore. Might flesh them out later
          
          F: I f*cking hate you. I wish C had k*lled you like I paid them too
          B: But they didn’t k*ll me!
          C: And I regret it everyday!
          
          A: Do you think F would officiate the wedding if we asked?
          E: Probably not
          F: *still tied to that chair actually*Definitely not
          
          D: I should be the flower dude
          B: Isn’t it the flower girl? And you’re kind of too old
          C: No one here is young enough to be a flower girl, let them do it
          B: You just want to see them in a dress
          C: I can still k*ll you, you know that right
          
          E: Lemon and white chocolate or blueberry and vanilla?
          F: Blueberry and vanilla
          E: I wasn’t talking to you *turns to A* which would you prefer in the wedding cake
          A: I kind of agree with F
          
          A: No
          B: Come on it would be funny
          F: Really funny
          A: F is not giving me away at the wedding! They’re tied to a chair for a reason!
          F: Spoilsport
          
          E: Why does F have a nerf super soaker?
          B: It’s got wine in it :}
          E: Great… but why?
          F: Since I don’t get to have any role in the wedding party-
          E: We asked you to officiate, you said no
          F: Don’t interrupt. As I was saying, since I have no role in the wedding party after you so crudely refused to let me give away A-
          E: Why would you be giving A away-
          F: INTERRUPTION! I’ll be on *sshole duty
          E: 
          E: I need to talk to my fiancé about this
          B: A bought the wine you know!

A: Now this is shaping up to be a real wedding! Which one of you will throw the bouquet is the final question?
          B: Uh, neither of us
          A: What, why?
          C: A, we don’t need to preform heteronormative traditions for it to be a real wedding. Neither of us have brides maids and you didn’t seem upset by that
          A: I just want there to be a bouquet toss. They always look so fun in movies
          B:
          C:
          B: Do you want to throw the bouquet?
          A:
          A: Is that an option?

A: You know, a lot of interesting things have happened in the past year
          A: B started a band which some how turned into a cult 
          B: It was an accident!
          A: C joined said cult
          B: Wait, what?
          C: That was your cult? If I’d known you were responsible for it I wouldn’t have joined
          B: Rude!
          A: My favorite non-cannon ship raised in popularity and I’m fairly certain its because of D’s book
          D: Any similarities are purely coincidental. I would never queer bait my readers unlike that crappy corporation you so eagerly give all your money to
          A: Said book some how became the holy scripture for B’s cult
          B: How?
          C: Is that why the teachings were so crappy? I wish I’d been told the two of you were involved, then I wouldn’t never have joined that other church
          D: How dare you? I put my heart and soul into that book. Let’s see if your messiah gets to survive in the sequel!
          E: Maybe you shouldn’t join any cults at all C
          A: And some how out of all of this, the only thing that hasn’t happened is my wedding
          E: There’s more important things than that you know
          A: How can you say that? I need to find an officiant, alongside replacing the entire wedding party cause most of them are in the goat cult
          B: Goat cult? Is that my cult?
          C: Maybe the holy goat can officiate?
          B: Holy goat? That wasn’t in my songs?
          D: That ones on me. I’ll make him a priest in the next installment
          E: *angry breath* B and D’s unholy god will not be officiating at our wedding, we’ll get a human. Right A?
          A: Depends, how much is the goat
          E: A!
          A: E, I just want to get married
          E: Fine, we can do the goat if he’s the cheapest option available
          F: *tied to a chair in the corner* You guys scare me

A tv show can have one singular queer character in it and then straight people will act as if that makes it the height of queer representation, meanwhile that queer character is being put through more trauma then their straight peers only to recieve a really pathetic last second happy ending or none at all. And there are far too many fandoms I have been involved in where this has happened. And then I’ll look at the female, POC, fat, physically disabled, and neurodivergent characters and they ain’t getting treated much better, especially when those characters are in multiple of these groups. 
          Just having a minority group character does not make a show in anyway good representation.
          
          Note; I am using the term minority as in someone treated unfairly due to the powers of the system that be

I can write a book where the entire main Cast is almost entirely just lesbians and queer women. That is power that I have. No one can stop me...

A: they say that behind every powerful man is a strong woman, so I’ve got 10 so I can be the most powerful man in the world!
          B:…okay but what am I here for?
          A: well you’re my boyfriend of course
          B:
          B: I can work with this
          *polite lesbian clapping from A’s legion of women*

"Not all men- " 
          Sir, full offense but any time a guy treats a woman with respect and doesn't expect sh*t from her in return you call him gay or trans or mentally unwell. I dont believe that you actually think this is a thing only bad men do if you emasculate any man who doesn't do these things. So. Shut. The. F*ck. Up.

*playing the captain is dead*
          *I put on some sci-fi series scores for background noise after playing star treckinn’*
          Roommate: Voltron is the show where cats turn into a giant man right?
          Me:
          Roommate: is that not right?
          Me: No? It’s right, it’s just not the way I would have explained it.

There are so many daffodils blooming on my college campus and the smell is just so reminiscent of my mom’s garden back home. Huh