Dear, Aqua
I'm so sorry for all the trouble and pain ive caused you over the last few months. I should've never outlashed out my anger and pain onto you. And all those times you tired to help me, ive constantly bit you and scared to while giving you nothing in return.
The pain I've hele onto for so long was miserable and depressing. I couldn't cry it out because i just thought just pushing forward would eventually wash it all away. But i realized it caused me nothing but Self hate, making me constantly neglect myself. And all those mistakes ive done in the past was no excuse to abuse you in such an unfair way. It was so childish and petty of me, taking your words that you never said to offend me and use against you, when you were only trying to help.
All the bruises, cuts, and bites that i passed onto you was just so stupid of me thinking that yelling or avoiding drama would also resolve my pain as well. But that only gave me regret and even more pain. And every time we fought, I constantly break yourself and your mental health which I do regret everytime i look back and wonder why I even did in the first place.
You had every to heal yourself and to ghost me cause of it. But i was also concerned of you too. A simple hey or im healing from you was all i needed from you... if you would've told me, i would've understood. But ghosting me only enraged me, which I really don't like that it feels like I just wasn't wanted or needed anymore. It honestly hurts more than if you were abusing me back the same way I did to you. If you wanna try and work this out again, we can, but im not forcing you.
I dont know what else to say except this.
I promised you an art piece to make up my all the hurtful things I ever did to you. And I generally understand that if you don't wanna talk anymore, but i hope what imma about to give you us fresh start of healing yourself~
Sincerely, Kosmic_collie