wakko

do you ever get that feeling where everytime someone speaks it's too loud and too annoying  and they're just joking but it's so annoying and loud

so billie eilish's new song, huh?
          
          
          
          excuse me while i sob uncontrollably

Why do I always wake up at 4:20 in the morning for no reason like um ok smoke wede i g u e s s

I'm late to the party (as always), but do you guys see me as a top, bottom, or switch? Idk why I'm doing this I just have nothing better to do lmao 

Sorry for that little rant, I'm done now

I know it's selfish but I didn't want to be the first person to see that. So anyways, J wasn't at the park so I look around in the woods behind it. Still nothing. I sit on the swings and just overthink and panic for a few minutes then start sprinting over to church, just in case J was there. Nothing bad actually happened, I saw J when leaving church when I was running, but I was so scared and I can't tell anybody about this. Everytime something happens to J I get terrified that they've killed themselves. I know it's selfish but I'm sick of being scared.

So I get dressed and pack up the sleeping bag and mattress to bring them to the basement but I never put the mattress all the way back where it's supposed to be because I was terrified that when I turned the corner...all I would see was J's dead body hanging there. So I go back upstairs and start heading down to the park to look for J. But as I get closer to the park I just get more scared because what if J had hung themselves at the park? I didn't want to see the hanging body of my older sibling

Now none of us (me, my friend, my dad) knew what had just happened because my dad was working out and me and my friend were listening to Hamilton, but J never came back to the house. So, when Mom gets back and my friend leaves, we're all wondering where J is. We wait maybe an hour or so, church should've been done by now, for J to show up. Still nothing.

So my older sibling used to be suicidal but now they're not, but they're still depressed. So my friend was over and my sibling and my mom we're going to go to church and...we're going to call my sibling J for now. So my j wants to bring their notebook with them that's like a death note notebook but mom says they can't. Long story short, they fight and Mom leaves without J and tells j to stay at home.

Ok, prepare yourselves for a rant. I'm only ranting on here because I don't have anybody else to talk to... Sorry in advance :))