Ch 1 Section 1 of "In Autumn".
September.
Behind the glass, a gentle breeze conveys fallen red and orange leaves to various directions and destinations, as a tall oak tree silently gazes in desolation.
Its elderly branches struggle to extend, desperately attempting to catch the swirling leaves, while also gripping to the ones remaining.
The leaves continue to drift aimlessly.
Journal Entry.
Father has always possessed a varying deck of multiple characters and accompanying faces, and under his violent control was a single card that reflected every emotion he had caged within himself likely since his youth: an overwhelming combination of stress, frustration, rage, and confusion.
It was this card he dealt often, to the dismay of both Mother and I. Our aligned struggles as a young family had broken and was easily forgotten among the accumulating years.
I, too, have a similar deck, and dealt similar cards of anger and dislike. I realize that I've taken these actions, possibly against misconception and misunderstanding from others of my character or personal struggles, since I had arrived from another distant country as a young child.
I had described my initial experiences within school in regards to the students as a scene of ocean waves pushing me farther from the safe shore, on which these children amused themselves and paid no attention to my cries for their aid.
Since then, I collected a rising fear to trust and find consolation in these others. I felt disliked, rejected, and as a result, misunderstood.
Another day drifts upon the fallen leaves, as I continue to follow this journey into September.