lazarein

hi. another edit-less update for this coming 2026. for anyone who cares.
          
          i'm writing again. not bright eyes, though. something else, something new. something that puts me in way less pain to go writing on. like a rant shaped in dark supernatural-comedy form. something that excites me and brings me the ecstasy i've been missing from coming up with scenes in my head and putting them to words. something that sounds more pop-punk than the alternative rock-shoegaze of bright eyes.
          
          i haven't come up with a blurb yet. haven't even made a cover for it. just putting down words one by one, smiling and laughing to myself, and seeing where this goes.
          
          'til next time.
          
          ;
          rein

A little unedited update on things:
          
          Honestly, the past year has been difficult—so busy, so tired, so worn out to do what I love. What makes things worse are the voices in my head, voices from those I thought to be “friends”, questioning my sanity, telling me how stupid and neurotic I am to realize the “truth”. I know I was being lied to, but what sucks is I took them all in as my own truth. They’ve made me question my mind, made me question my self-worth (to the point they’ve resurrected my suicidal thoughts). They’ve made me question my skill and talent as a writer. (Do I even have the skill and talent to call myself one?)
          
          I’m not making promises now. But this year, I hope to recover, to fight past the voices, find the the time and energy to write again. It’s only through the written word I can truly be myself, and I want to be myself again. I want to love myself to acknowledge that I deserve better than those decades of abuse.
          
          So, thank you for your patience, and those little words of encouragement that keep me going for a while before the voices drown me again.
          
          I hope to heal and to write again. I really do.
          
          - rein

Hello! Just checking in to say, I hope you're well! :) <3

Whoa! I didn’t even notice. :o Thanks, Dana! ♥️

In attaining success, integrity is such a HUGE thing to me now. Apparently not everyone’s got it. *shrugs*

Things have been going so rough these days & with all these added responsibilities in volunteer work I haven’t been able to write … I hope you’re all patient with me … & I hope I’ll learn to be patient with myself as well …

It’s been one year, little Blue. Miss you.

@yes-shewrites Thank you. That means so much. O.O ♥️

No prob. And, to be honest, you’re not the only one experiencing writerly self-doubt right now, so I’m glad to give you some encouragement—you CAN write, believe me. ;) And thank you for your support on Bright Eyes as well. ♥️

I just noticed this now. Hahaha. Thank you so much, Dana!