hey gng
im feeling pretty awful today after receiving some of my end-of-year exams back. some things im happy with, and some things not so much but ik i can do better and improve and pull myself together for my BIG exams next year in those subjects, such as latin, maths, physics, chem.
but then there’s biology. and german.
i hate bio, i don't likebio, i can't deal with bio, i really despise bio from the bottom of my heart. i couldn't bring myself to revise because i barely had the motivation. it used to be my favourite science a few years ago and idek what changed but its terrible. i got higher than i expected but it’s still terrible and idk how to tell my parents because the sciences are meant to be my strongest subjects. i hate myself bc i shouldve revised, and i did, but my heart was never in it and i just UGHHHHHHH
for german, ive only got my speaking part back and im so disappointed in myself. i have never done this bad before and even my teacher walked up to me and told me she knew i could do better. ive never had below 80% before in my german exams. not this time.
idk im just trying to let it go and let it all out before i face the shitshow that is me telling my parents but i just can't. i want to cry but i also can't, physically. id ask for a bio tutor but my parents are already spending money on me for physics bc my school is useless with physics. idk bro.
i just needed to vent online because i don't want to heap this all on my best friends irl cus they’re also dealing with their own issues. it doesnt make me feel any better but i just need some people to know im trying.
bye xx