This is to anyone who will be paired with me in critique clubs, or anyone who will ask me for a critique on their work.
I just want to preface my critiques, should you get any from me, that they are not a personal attack on you as an individual.
My aim is to critique writers to write better female characters with dynamic, attitude, character, personality, individuality, and most especially, with backbones. If your female character lives and only breathes for men or the approval of men, or worse, the incessant need to be "unlike other girls", I am so sorry but, I will tell you the honest truth.
Similarly, I also aim to critique writers to write better male characters, who are able to be dark and steamy and intense and smouldering and whatchamacallit, without resorting to the same behavioral patterns of abusive or otherwise, predatory men. If your male character does not understand consent and boundaries, I will also tell you the honest truth.
As a writer, we actually have a social responsibility to write stories that can influence people's thinking, so to hide behind saying "it's just art" when we are being asked to do better on behalf of the female characters we create, or on the way we write our male characters we want our FMCs or our readers to love, is not only ridiculous, it is wrong. We can absolutely write about problematic situations/people and perhaps even should but in doing so we should acknowledge that they are problematic. We should not try to rationalize it or make it look like, "this is what's hot/romantic/sexy".
So, again, please consider listening instead of being defensive. Because it is a shame that for most writers, there is a talent hiding behind problematic characters and writing. It takes away from our gift of being able to write. Let's all do better by writing better. ❤️