@lesbianl0v3rgirl, here is some perspective to the most recent chapter. I really wanted to get into the character's emotional state here. She's under so much pressure being a graduate student, then becoming involved in a relationship that, regardless of actual regulations, is taboo and likely frowned upon by others. Additionally, she has fallen pregnant at a time which is not beneficial for her with a man who she has not been with for long, all the while trying to prevent a pregnancy in the first place. Also, because of her parents' death and their past professions of chemistry, she feels that she has to hold up to and exceed their presumed expectations. All of these stressors at once have caused her to break down mentally, and she is struggling with her own self-actualization and with becoming the person she thought she would be. For some people with mental illness or trauma, a coping mechanism (albeit ineffective) is self depreciation, and part of growing through your illness and into yourself is learning to cope properly, which we will eventually see from her.
