aquaxk

What you are not changing you are choosing

aquaxk

Hi! It's been a while. 
          
          I just want to vent it out here.
          
          I feel so bad and sorry for my dog. I think I abandoned him. He was the love of my life before (up to now) and years passed that I did not realize that I was neglecting him already. I became so reliant to the fact that he is breathing and with me.
          
          Today, I saw how bad his situation is. Although I am feeding him everyday and making sure he has extra treatment it's not enough pala. I neglected his condition. How his fur get so bad, how his skin has lots of wounds, and how his **** bleed. I ignore signs that he is hurting and it led to now. He needs me pala although he seems not to care and nonchalant. I thought he is fine na pinapakain ko lang siya, na binebaby talk ko lang siya. I do not deserve the trust and love he gave me and made me feel. 
          
          So Lord, please, let me take care of him this time. Let me make it up to him. 
          
          Please Lord, I need Dugoo in my life po.
          
          I don't want to come at a point where I feel disappointed again not just in academics but to this as well :((

aquaxk

@aquaxk answered prayer, tyL
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aquaxk

It is not the same anymore. I tried to read again here but I guess I am at the point of my life where I have to be in the present. I will try to get back here but for now I have to say goodbye. It's a happy place, a good memory, and a habit that once made me feel alive. I love you, Wattpad, my home for 8 years

aquaxk

@aquaxk I will also miss posting about my thoughts here. My companion through everything. My listener, a voiceless friend. 
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aquaxk

I'm at the point of my life wherein I don't know anymore. I feel like a lot of things were taken out of my body, soul and generally-life. That I cannot retrieve those back and it is sososo hard to lift myself again. going back is challenging.

aquaxk

Be Alright - Lola Rhodes
          
          11:38 pm // June 5, 2023
          
          I'M TIRED. EMPTY. HOPELESS. NO DREAM.
          
          I miss my teenage self. Now I just don't know if it's still living or lying to the world that I'm okay and I'm the me pa rin. Sobrang hirap na parang hindi nakikita yung worth mo, yung love mo. Ganon ba talaga? Nauunawaan ko naman sila, LAGI. I'm the kind of person kasi na when one has so much weight to carry, I will try to lift some of it for that person. Pero, kulang pa din pala. Siguro in my POV I did much pero for them it's not enough. Siguro ganon. I feel self centered, misunderstood and alone these days. Also, napansin ko na 'di ko na masyadong nakakausap si God sa thoughts ko. Maybe it's also the reason why I am sad some times.
          
          

aquaxk

I am becoming too much. My laziness, no emptiness, is taking a toll on my studies. My time management is really awful. To the point where many days of my time were put only to certain tasks. Lord, sorry. i am so sorry. It's my first time to do this, to not review beforehand for such a special exam, a major one.