ashtheoncelar

fuxking fuxk fuxk 
          	life sucks a$s rn and I’m going to explod3 
          	
          	don’t you love it when you never wake up to any “I know you’re asleep but…” messages and don’t receive any love from friends / a partner but give it all out?? cuz same lol  

ashtheoncelar

fuxking fuxk fuxk 
          life sucks a$s rn and I’m going to explod3 
          
          don’t you love it when you never wake up to any “I know you’re asleep but…” messages and don’t receive any love from friends / a partner but give it all out?? cuz same lol  

ashtheoncelar

this message may be offensive
heyyyy! 
          
          lol gonna get right into the problems of today, though no ones gonna see it 
          
          dont you hate it when you share the fact taht you’re not doing okau and then they say “ME” and leave it at tgat? 
          because same lmao 
          
          anyways dad called me by my name and I got happy then whaddya know? back to being a transphobic asshole  
          
          anyways I hope you’re okay. love you <3 

ashtheoncelar

hi. 
          
          I don’t wanna write anymore bc life is horrible and no one rlly cares. 
          I’ve so much lost my love for ‘The Love That Grows Inside’ and I super madly don’t think I have what it takes to continue writing it.  
          I know no one reads these but that’s okay. Sometimes it just bothers me. That I know that people see things, but don’t like them. Or like them but don’t see them, y’know? 
          
          Writing this story was so much fun and I had every single plot planned out... But I really, really lost my inspiration and backbone to this story. 
          
          I will not be continuing “The Love That Grows Inside” anymore. 
          
          Thank you for understanding. I’m so so so sorry. 

ashtheoncelar

lmao im not okay(: 
          
          feels like the universe hates us (thanks for reminding me, Adam Silvera.) 
          sometimes I wanna be the one loved, rather than the one giving love, y’know? like I know I need it, but I’m terrified to ask for it because I’ve done it before and it feel like it ended well. 
          
          lol anyways next message gonna be abt writing 

ashtheoncelar

heyyyyyyy. 
          how’s everyone doing?? 
          I’m basically feeling extremely bleh, and tired and just y’know overall trash. But that’s okay. Mostly. 
          Anyways I read the fanfic Heat Waves on ao3 by tbhyourelame and OHMYGOD its wonderful :) 
          Next order of business is essentially something that no one really cares abt but I’m saying anyway: 
          I legit wanna quit writing, but yk no one really cares, so again, it wouldn’t really matter anyways 
          
          Enjoy the new update!! xoxo 
          - Ash <3 

ashtheoncelar

Hey all! 
          I am... stuck. 
          Very. Fuxk!ng. Stuck. 
          I’m trying so so so so hard to keep writing and keep progressing with the story, and I have another chapter that *could* be posted... But, I don’t like posting a chapter without having anything behind what I’ve ended with unless I know that I’m ending the story (which it is *nowhere* near finished). But I’m so so so stuck with what to write and what to do next... I’ve got a few ideas, but the summary of the next chapter is essentially : 
          
          Tsukki goes to talk to some old friends about his “situation” and goes to bed at our last time stamp (01.17 A.M.) 
          
          Now, I could do a time skip to a few months / weeks later and give detail on the TeruYama relationship, make our Tsukki life go up, and give dynamics between the three. And then end the next section in our next “moment” 
          Or 
          I could go by week periods and give close ups on their lives as time goes on gradually build up and stop at the “moment” 
          
          Thoughts? And again, I am so so so sorry! 
          Much love, Author Ash <3 

ashtheoncelar

HEYYYYYYYY! 
          
          I’m still writing, I promise! Things are just a little slow because of the holidays and poor weather and trying to get ready to go back to classes! 
          But I promise I’m still writing. I’ve got another chapter done, but I need to edit and revise it before uploading! The next chapter is on the works, but it’s a little more difficult to me because there’s a slight timeskip  
          
          I hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday to those who celebrated it! 
          And Happy New Year!! We’re finally done with 2020!!!! 
          
          Sending much love, Ash <3