@aconfuseddemibitch So, it appears that your mom is accepting, so that is good. I am sure your dad will be accepting as well, since your mom thought that you should also tell him. Also he will be less homophobic about it because you came out as asexual. If for whatever reason he is not okay with it, you should play it off as you are not ready to have sex now, and might want some in the future, and then you should have a talk with your mom about him not accepting you. It might be lying to him, but if he isn't accepting that is your best bet until you can move out. Try to breath and read some fanfictions. That always helped me with panic attacks. My only advice on cutting yourself is to make sure you don't cut too much. You haven't had the encounter with your dad yet, and it will probably go better than you expect. If you want to talk about this or something else, I will be available to talk to.