𝒾 𝑔𝑜𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓈𝓌𝒶𝑔 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓉'𝓈 𝓅𝓊𝓂𝓅𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝓂𝒶' 𝑜𝓋𝒶𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓈

those who are concerned with my depressing ass poetry- please get something better to do. if you don't like my work, suck your own dick loser.

@plaayguk thank you, i have sem exams this month so busy & i stay here to read works by my friends mostly, so yeah.

@ayendrla yes it diddd, you too take care and have a happy time, i am writing smt issliye kabhi active kabhi inactive what about you???

@plaayguk it's okay , hope your day went good

@mothernaturesteeth ;; much love, happy new yr < 3

how home looks the day before you leave;
            
            the sunlight feels a lot lighter and shimmery over your skin
            you'd wonder it all of it is real, this place you call home
            or the idea of it. your mother will call you gently from the 
            kitchen and it sound a lot like the announcement lady talking
            about your departing flight. the sunlight filters through the
            window and you take a look outside, it becomes a lot like when
            you were just ten and not used to time and colours; everything
            a little too bright and everything else a little too slow. you'll 
            wonder if your father really loves you, but you'll realise he had
            been trying in his own messy ways. you'll try to memories the way
            your mother's lip feel against your cheek, or the tears that glide
            down your cheek or the sad eyes that your father gives you unknowingly.
            you'll also see the wind kiss your face a lot more than before and the floors going cold. you'll try to stick the taste of home cooked meal on your tongue and store the smell of this place in your sternum.
            
            but you'll fail.
            
            you'll be at the airport or the bus stand and wonder if someone is going to pick you up. you'll scroll through the pictures and try to memorise everything of this so called home. you try to recall the touches and the taste and the smell, but nostalgia has left you at the doorsteps of beginnings. it has left you you be new again.
            
            you enter your room again, there is this cheap smell of rose perfume your roommate uses. you don't know whose arms you want to cry in again.
            
            03.01.2026

Get around/ talk about me/ You pretend when you can't be/ Who you want/ who you want/ ah/ Got a script you can't erase/ Got a mask glued to your face/ Take it off/ take it off/ Do you wanna know/ Know/ know about me?/ I swear/ you can take control/ Control of how my heart bleeds/ How my heart bleeds/How my heart bleeds/Feel it/ you've gotta relax/ baby/ Put your hands (hands/ hands)/ Around my ribcage (oh/ 'cage)/We can dance (okay/ dance)/ Until we hit the grave (grave)/ Sociopath/ after the math/ I know you wanna see what's under/ Our souls are a match/ You're first/ but you're last/ And do you really wanna know?/ Do you wanna know? (Wanna know)/ Know/ know about me? ('Bout me/ 'bout me/ about me)/ I swear/ you can take control (take control)/ Control of how my heart bleeds/ How my heart bleeds (bleeds)/ How my heart bleeds/ How my heart bleeds/ How my heart bleeds/ How my heart bleeds (my heart bleeds)/ How my heart bleeds (how my heart bleeds)/ How my heart bleeds/ How my heart bleeds/ How my heart bleeds/ Bleeds.
            (Heart bleeds)
            (Heart bleeds/ bleeds)
            
            02.01.2026

“You have always been sad and never angry, why are you always so sad?”
            
            because you grieve the end of something even before it starts, you mingle the yearning with the uneven start and wonder why you are feeling this way. you are angry, believe me— you are so angry at this habit of yours, the sabotaging of happiness in your life. you grieve— you grieve a happy ending and the moments you had absolutely loved. it’s something wrong, something that you would leave at the grave of your old lover.
            
            01.01.2026